


Tales From Jakku

by ZigguratRolsovitch



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, F/M, Jakku, Love Scene, Young Ben Solo, Young Rey, but not between reylo, scavenger ben
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-14
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-01-17 03:05:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 25,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12356163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZigguratRolsovitch/pseuds/ZigguratRolsovitch
Summary: AU series of oneshots: Luke Skywalker decides that the only way to keep both Rey and his nephew safe from Sith Lord Snoke is to place them both into hiding on the backwater planet of Jakku. These are their adventures.





	1. Day 1

**Author's Note:**

> Day 1

It was a clever way to get rid of him. He was sure of it. His uncle had sent him to this back water planet by the name of Jakku with the little girl to keep her from the hands a Sith.

He had hated it. Despised the duty his uncle had left him with almost as much as he hated and despised his parents for having sent him away. They never cared about him. His family never thought about anything other than their own goals and needs.

Watching his uncle's ship leave him here at Nimma Outpost's shipyard he slowly clenched his fist tighter and tighter around his lightsaber before he lost his temper and tossed it hard across the shipyard and it slammed into a random pile of junk. It startled the poor girl and for some reason it made him smile faintly. She was the reason he was here after all. It shouldn't matter if he scared her, but then... it did. It slowly began to bother him. He shouldn't even care about how the stupid kid felt.

He didn't have much more time to think about it before he realized that his outburst had drawn attention. He called his saber back to him and attached it back to his belt before he scowled and picked up their bag and slung it over his shoulder.

"Let's go, kid. I've got to find some place to stash you." He may never have wanted this assignment, but he had it and he was going to get the job done one way or another. He knew that staying near a shipyard was the worst thing he could do for them.

So he decided to head out into the desert. It was an unpleasant journey, but one that was necessary for survival. They passed huge ships. He knew his history well enough that he recalled the details of the battle. They passed The Ravager and Freedom's Dawn. Two of the largest ships out here, but he kept going. Two of the first places he'd look if he were a Sith.

Unfortunately Rey was too small to even keep up with him or keep going in the heat of this desert for that matter. Still she was a tough little thing. She had not complained even once about their situation. Stopping he let out a sigh and glanced back at her. It was going to be a stupid and risky move, but he knew that he had to carry her if they were going to find shelter before the night came. He turned back and swept her up into his arms.

"Hey! I'm a grown up! I can walk by myself thank you very much." She insisted and he might be able to take her seriously if she hadn't crossed her arms and pouted the way she had.

"You're six. I think you've got a few more years to go." Carrying this extra weight was an easy way to overheat, but he didn't want her to pass out either. He had to take the risk. The longer they stayed in the open the higher the risk level went.

The more time went by the darker it got and he was well aware that the desert got cold at night. Finally he came across the remains of a ship. An Imperial II-class Star Destroyer completely split in two. The front had slid some distance down the dunes, but the back end was completely level and sunken securely into the sand.

The ship was named The Punishment. A very fitting name.

Perhaps that was the reason that he chose this as their temporary home... or perhaps it was something more. Something that called to him. Whatever it was he decided that the bridge of the ship was the perfect place. It was high up enough that they would be able to see anyone coming and the windows were still intact. Much of it was well preserved. It was the ideal set up. Or at least the best one could get out here in the middle of nowhere.

"Alright, Rey... all we have to do is take the stairs up to the bridge and we can rest." He knew that she had to be exhausted even if she was too stubborn to admit to it.

He lifted his head and glanced up the stairs and let out a breath. This was going to take some time. He started up the steps and decided he was glad that Luke had made him work so hard because he physically would never have been able to make it this far without said training.

Upon reaching the top he set Rey and the bag of supplies down and doubled over to try to catch his breath. He was exhausted. The first thing that he did was find a place to sit down where he could lean his back against the wall. Now he took in the shape of the bridge. It was filled with sand... a little rusted, but other than that it was in good shape. He would find the cracks where the sand had found it's way in and seal them up. That wouldn't be too hard.

He reached for the supply bag and Rey noticed and shoved the bag closer with all her might so that he wouldn't have to get up and get it. He appreciated her efforts and the fact that it provided a little humor for him to watch her try so hard. At least at her age she liked helping out instead of complaining about it.

The first thing he dug out was the water. He needed a drink and once he had some he handed it over to Rey.

"Try not to spill." He dug through the bag again and pulled out the sleep sacks. They were going to have to make due with what they had here until he could get something better set up. He laid one out over the sand because it would be a lot softer than the cold, hard metal and the other would have to be a blanket.

Standing he made his way over to the viewport and placed a hand against the smooth surface as he looked outside. The sun was just over the horizon and it was about to get very cold. He had wanted to get things set up a bit more, but there was no time for that now.

He would have to start first thing in the morning.

"Come here. Lights out."

"But I don't wanna." Rey pouted, but suddenly his arm was around her and he was dragging her into the bed and tucking her in.

"Well it's getting dark and it's about to get really cold. So that's just too bad, kid." He crawled under the covers as well and turned the lights out.

He watched the ceiling and how the small red/purple beams of light were slowly fading away and the darkness was over taking the room. Rey was on her side kicking and tossing and turning. Angry at him no doubt.

Though while the room became nearly pitch black save for the tiny blue light on the datapad setting on top of their pack he started to feel an uncomfortable sinking feeling in his gut. He was exhausted and he had nothing to focus on now. Nothing to distract him from his thoughts.

After a moment or two he made a little sound and then he turned over towards Rey, tried to get a bit closer, draped an arm over her.

Rey on the other hand was having none of those and she growled like a tiny kitten and shoved his heavy arm off and turned away. He didn't move or do anything for a moment after that, but then he shifted closer and she turned around to shove tiny hands at his chest.

"Get off." She wasn't tired, but she was never going to fall asleep if he kept being a brat. And here this over grown baby told her to act her age. When he tried again she only grew even more irritated. "Get off, Ben!"

Letting out a frustrated groan he turned and finally faced away from her, but now Rey noted that she could sense something off about him... she tried to reach out to it like Luke taught her and that was when she realized it... he wasn't cold... Ben was scared. He had been dropped off and left on this planet with a child to take care of and it terrified him.

He had been seeking some sort of comfort. With that in mind Rey scooted up against his back. His only reaction was to scoff, but... Rey knew that deep down he was grateful for the little bit of comfort it brought him even if he was still scared.

But now Rey was afraid, because if a grown up like Ben was scared... what was she going to do and didn't that mean she had to be afraid too?

The future seemed very unclear.


	2. Day 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 2

Upon waking Rey was made very aware of the warm sun glaring in through the big windows and although she might want to go back to sleep after the long journey had worn her out. Judging by where the sun was Rey supposed that it was late in the day.

As she rolled over she came to the realization that Ben wasn't next to her and she patted the spot where he'd been. It wasn't even warm. He must have been gone for quite some time. It occurred to her then that she was completely alone. Sitting up she knew that he wasn't anywhere in the room.

"Ben?" She knew it was hopeless, but part of her hoped that he would answer.

He didn't.

She was completely alone in place and she was struck with the terrifying idea that perhaps Ben had decided that he wasn't going to take care of her after all and had just left her. Left her like the parents that abandoned her at Luke's academy.

With all her might she shoved the blankets off of herself and quickly started to search around the bridge to see if he were somewhere here. He wasn't. She rushed towards the exit and then down the spiraling stairway... out into the burning desert.

The light was blinding after being in the dark corridor and she had to raise a tiny hand to try and block it out.

"What are you doing?" A gruff voice came from off to her side and she turned to find Ben there working under some sort of contraption.

The only reply he got was a sort of sniffle and he paused in the midst of his work and slowly pushed out from under the frame to look at her. He worried maybe she'd hurt herself, but he only found her sniffling and wiping at her eyes.

"Ben... I thought you left me..."

"Left you...? I... oh... no... Rey..." Initially he had wanted to get angry and tell her to stop being such a crybaby, but he saw her face... that sad little face and his heart broke with a familiar sort of pain. He knew that sort of pain. He saw it reflected back at him whenever he looked into the mirror and so that was why he held out his arms. "Come here."

She flung herself into his arms without a moments hesitation and he let out a little huff of air with how hard she slammed into him. Tougher than he expected. She smacked his chest a few times with tiny little fists and he frowned faintly at the strong reaction, but he understood and he let her get it out of her system.

"You're mean, Ben! Don't ever leave me like that again!"

"I know. I'm sorry, Rey." He hugged the poor girl tightly and gave his best attempt at comforting her. "I won't ever leave you, sweetheart. I promise."

They stayed like that until she gradually calmed down and he sensed some form of embarrassment as she moved away from him. Good. It was too hot out here in the desert to stay close for too long.

"What were you building?" Rey still tried to clear her eyes of the tears, wiped the mess on her face and calmed her breathing as best as she could manage.

"Well... Uncle Luke... was a moisture farmer... it gave me the idea to build a moisture vaporator so we don't run out of water... and... we won't have to rely on trading for portions. We can grow our own food. Do a little hydroponic gardening." He moved back underneath the frame to continue his work.

"Ohhhh." Rey tilted her head to the side. "Ben... I think you're really smart. I don't care what the other students at the academy said."

"Thanks-..." And then he processed the entire sentence after a second of thinking it through and frowned. "Right."

"Can I help?"

"I guess so... you can start by handing me that bonding tape."

They continued to work together and Rey noticed that Ben didn't seem so afraid anymore. He was bursting with energy and that made her feel better about the whole situation. If Ben wasn't afraid then she felt like she had nothing to fear herself.

The work continued until the night fell and as much as she would love to continue working on their project together he wouldn't have it. Initially Rey didn't take his warnings of how cold it got at night, but tonight it was especially obvious. It was absolutely freezing. She thought maybe she should start listening when he said something because he was usually right.

He spoke in lengths about working on some way to insulate the bridge so that they could keep warm at night, but for now she had to rely on him for warmth. Her hands and her toes were freezing and she so curled her hands into his shirt tucked her feet between his thighs to keep warm.

He shivered and then a scowl twisted his mouth up.

"Your feet are like ice!" He complained and yet he let her keep her feet there. He knew that she needed to be kept warm. The last thing he needed was her getting frostbite.

"It's cold." Rey whined and he let out a huff.

"I know, I know. Just bare with it for now. I'll figure something out." Sighing he closed his eyes and focused on keeping her warm throughout the night.

Things might not be perfect, but after a good night's rest and a little tenacity he felt a little more hopeful than he did. There was a little light in this darkness after all.


	3. Day 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 3

"Ben... I need help with my hair..." The first question of the new day and well he wasn't quite sure how to take that.

"I'm not a hair guy..." He shifted as he went about trying to get their datapad working again, because at some point he suspected sand got into the cracks and were interfering with something on the inside.

He had managed to make some good progress on the moisture vaporator with Rey's help, but the heat had gotten to the point that it was overwhelming and he knew they needed a break from it all. So he settled for working on some things inside the bridge. Making their home a little more like a home.

"Ben, please. I can't do it on my own."

"I told you... I don't do hair."

"Liar. You have a padawan braid."

"That is the hairstyle of a warrior... not a girly style." There was a long silence and by the time he actually looked up at her she had crossed her arms and pouted at him.

"You're supposed to take care of me." Rey grumbled.

Letting out an annoyed huff he slammed his tools down and then patted the spot in front of him to signify that she had won. Her attitude had a complete turn around as she quickly moved to sit in front of him and he felt a little annoyed at how she knew just how to manipulate him.

He furrowed his brow and gathered up some of her hair, brushing out some tangles with his fingers and then trying his best to figure out how to do her favorite hairstyle, but really he had no idea what he was doing.

While he tried to figure out how to get this whole hair thing to work Rey picked up the datapad and fiddled around with it... shook it and seemed to have dislodged the sand because it fired up and projected an entire system before them in the evening light.

"There are so many! Has anyone ever been to them all, Ben?" She asked in amazement as she explored the galaxy through the datapad.

"Not likely." He answered grasping the edge of her hair and then bringing them up in some attempt to actually get it tied into the buns that she liked so much. He cursed his uncle for showing her the complicated style. He was very focused on accomplishing the difficult task regardless. "I think I've got it..."

"Thanks, Ben. I promise I'll help you do yours next time!"

"Tch. Not likely, brat." He crossed his own arms over his chest and he knew that the smile on her face was worth the effort.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This short and art was heavily inspired by the song Young - Vallis Alps


	4. Day 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 31

They had been here a month and Ben noticed that Rey had started feeling down. He wasn't sure what the cause of it was, but he suspected it was because she was a bit lonely. She didn't have other children to play with like she had at the academy and he spent all his time trying to keep them alive.

So today was going to be different. While he had been scavenging through the rest of The Punishment for more parts for the vaporator to keep it up and running he'd found a snack dispenser. They had been left safely behind the transparisteel and though it'd taken quite awhile to break... in the end he was successful.

With all the items safely packed away in his bag he slowly made his way back up to the surface.

A long time ago he had learned to crush down any feelings he had until there was nothing left to feel except his burning rage. He crushed down his hurt and his pain and his disappointment... he crushed down excitement that always led to disappointment, but today...

today he was excited because he had found something that he knew was going to bring a smile to Rey's face and he had missed that smile. He had found in Rey what had been killed inside of him and he wanted to protect that innocence. That childlike wonder. He would do anything to protect it.

With renewed energy he hurried up the steps to the bridge and once inside he dropped the bag down next to their sleeping space and dropped down next to Rey. It was still early and she was still asleep.

"Rey... wake up." He carefully laid down on his stomach as he reached into the bag for one of the candy bars to hold it up, but Rey didn't open her eyes and shoved her hand against his face to get him to go away and let her sleep. He chuckled quietly. "Comeon, Rey. I have something for you."

Those words seemed to have gotten her attention and Rey peeked an eye open to try to focus through blurry morning vision to find out what could be so important that he would wake her this early.

"What is it?" She asked with a little yawn as she pushed herself up into a sitting position.

"What is it? What does it look like?" He held it up between two fingers and couldn't quite manage to keep that lopsided smile off his face when Rey let out a little gasp and took the candy bar to slowly open it up and take a bite.

"Ohhhh... how did you find it?"

"Down in the other half of the destroyer... and... I have a whole bag full. All for you. In moderation of course."

"All of it? A whole bag? What about you, Ben? Don't you want some?"

"No. I don't like sweet things. So... all for you." He reached into the bag for the other prize he'd manged to get his hands on. "And... I found a Dejarik board."

"Really?" Rey's eyes were lit up like the stars. "Thank you, Ben. You're the best Jedi ever."

"You're welcome, Rey."   
  
You couldn't wipe the smile off his face with the best mop in the galaxy. Here she had been so down lately and now he was able to see that childish delight once more. He knew that he would do whatever it took to keep that happiness there.


	5. Day 66

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darker themes ahead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 66

He had to make a supply run. He'd gathered some decent pieces of equipment from the deepest parts of the destroyer where nobody had ever managed to get into... with a little help from The Force even though he had been forbidden to use it, but... nobody needed to know that. It wasn't like anyone would ever find them here.

 

Initially he'd wanted to leave Rey behind in the safety of their home, but she had begged to go with this time and he didn't have the heart to say no. It wouldn't be a long trip. He only needed medical supplies. He hadn't told her, but he'd cut himself pretty badly on his last search through the destoryer when a door slammed closed on him. He needed supplies to prevent infection. 

 

The thought of dying of infection and leaving Rey all alone terrified him. She needed him. He had to be there for her.

 

The feeling of Rey shifting on his shoulders brought him out of that terrible thought and he had to tighten his hold on her to keep her from falling off.

 

"You're like a tauntaun, Ben."

 

"A tauntaun...?" His jaw dropped and he made to sound offended. "Please, Rey... if anything I would be a fathier."

 

"You aren't as fast as a fathier."

 

"I bet I could be... I bet I can make it to the outpost gates in ten seconds." 

 

"You're on." Rey challenged.

 

"Hold tight then..." He warned while he made sure to hold her securely where she couldn't fall off and then he broke into a sprint while Rey broke into laughter. 

 

The inhabitants of the outpost simply looked on without really understanding the whole idea of having fun. They thought the two newcomers were ridiculous in their antics, but that was alright because they didn't need the world's approval to have fun.

 

By the time he reached the gates he was out of breath, but they were both unable to contain the laughter which he knew drew some attention. Though he chose to ignore it. As the saying went wolves didn't lose sleep over the opinion's of sheep.

 

"I'm going to talk to that big ugly Crolute over there... you stay right here and don't go anywhere. I'll be right back." He lifted Rey from his shoulders and carefully set her down near the tables where various scavengers were cleaning their gear to ready it for trade in. Making his way over he slammed down a few parts he'd scavenged he knew were worth the trade. "I need medical supplies."

 

"Mmmmm." Plutt looked over the supplies and shook his head. "I'll give you three bacta patches."

 

"Not good enough." He refused to budge. Three days wasn't enough for this.

 

"If you really want a good supply you could always trade the kid... they can fit into the smaller places to scavenger or repair... I always have a use for them."

 

"No. Give me what this is worth." 

 

"I told you what it's worth, boy!"

 

He tried to continue his argument with Plutt and talk some sense into him, because it was a bad deal. It was hard to work with someone that knowingly wanted to give you a bad deal and get something good out of it.

 

It was why he didn't notice the man that approached Rey. 

 

"Hello there, child." The man greeted and Rey lifted her gaze to look up at the tall man before her. "You looking to buy some portions?"

 

"I think Ben is." Rey answered as she glanced back towards Ben and watched the two arguing heatedly.

 

"Ooh, such a pretty little girl. Would you like a sweet, little thing? I have some back at my speeder if you want to come along."

 

"I have to wait for Ben." 

 

"What about speeders? Do you like speeders?"

 

It was then that Ben glanced back and saw them. He cursed under his breath when he noticed the man next to her and he had to shove the bag of scavenged goods forward and accept the bad deal so that he could rush over to Rey.

 

"Get away from her." He demanded and watched as whatever false kindness was on the man's face faded and turned into something angry and twisted.

 

"How old are you?" The man questioned, but he felt he wasn't inclined to give him any sort of answer. "From what I can tell you're still just a boy. No older than your teens. Where do you get off telling me what to do?"

 

"She was put under my charge and I'm telling you to leave her alone. I don't care if you like it or not. Back off." He reached forward to quickly grab Rey's hand and pull her behind him where she was safe.

 

"Ben?" She questioned in confusion, because the poor girl, bless her innocent soul had no idea what was going on here.

 

"Boy... I could pound you into the dust, but since I'm a nice guy I'll offer an alternative... there's no reason you can't share."

 

"You..." Ben's face lips twisted up into a scowl and he clenched his fists, so angry that he was shaking. This monster. This animal... he thought that of him and he looked at Rey the way he did... nothing could have made him angrier. 

 

"I don't mind shar-omf!" The man didn't even get to finish his sentence before Ben hauled off and punched him with all the strength he had and a little backing from the force. It hurt him badly, but it enraged the man.

 

The man immediately turned on him, grabbed him by his collar and struck him directly in the stomach, right where that door injured him. It stole his breath away, but before long they were both trading blows... he could hear Rey... crying maybe... it didn't matter. He had to finish this.

 

"Enough!" A voice cut in that stopped them both. The big, lumbering Crolute had appeared from behind his stand and grabbed them both to separate them. "Fighting is bad for business! If you want to fight do it elsewhere!"

 

Plutt threw them both in opposite directions.

 

"This isn't finished, boy!" The man warned as he stumbled off, holding a hand to his nose that gushed blood.

 

"Come on, Rey..." Ben sniffed rubbed as his own face and then quickly lifted her up onto his shoulders to hurry out of here. He didn't trust that the man and he wanted to get out before he recovered or brought friends.

 

"Why were you and that man fighting?" Rey was so confused and upset and he was afraid that she might start crying. She sounded like she would.

 

"Because he was a bad man, Rey. From now on... stay by my side. Don't talk to strangers. Okay? You have to promise."

 

"I promise, Ben."

 

He rushed to get them both home, all the while watching behind him to make sure he wasn't followed and covering his tracks. He didn't want that sort of trouble following them home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your actions will have consequences.


	6. Day 2,655

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 2,655

Morning already. Ben groaned and tugged the sleeping bag over his head and tried to block out the light. Normally he was an early riser. Preferring to be up before the sun rose so that he could go out and gather the water and get breakfast started for him and Rey, but for some reason... he had been exhausted the past week.

Not to mention the awful ache in his back he'd been feeling. That was in and of itself strange because he wasn't sure what he had done to hurt his back. Maybe carrying water up, but he'd done that every day for the past seven years. It shouldn't be such a big deal.

As he turned over he grimaced and then pressed a hand against his stomach. Now that hurt. It was even more strange. He knew for certain he hadn't eaten anything bad. He shouldn't have an upset stomach.

Sitting up slowly he reached up to run a hand back through his hair and glanced over to Rey's spot. She wasn't there. Another strange thing. She had been sleeping in about as much as he had and was irritable on top of it. Maybe she'd caught the same bug he apparently had?

Another cramp in his gut made him jump slightly and as he dropped his hand down to the spot he came to a realization. It wasn't his pain that he was feeling right now. It was Rey's. That worried him. Had she hurt herself? Was she injured and needed help?

He quickly pushed himself out of the bed and hurried to the 'fresher door and banged a fist against it.

"Rey... open up..." He demanded.

"No!" Her voice came through equally full of panic.

"Did you get hurt? Rey?"

He shifted his weight from foot to foot as he awaited her answer and he could hear her moving around faintly in the other room.

"I'm bleeding." Rey admitted.

"Where? Let me in. I need to see." He reached for the door and tired to open it up to no avail, but he didn't really expect her to have unlocked it that easily.

"NO! You can't see there!" Her reply came immediately.

"There?" Something clicked in his brain and he turned back towards their bed to kneel down and pull the blanket back. As he thought they were stained with some blood. He sighed then, leaned his head back and reached his hand to press against the back of his neck as he rolled it to maybe relieve some of the tension he felt. "Oh boy..."

"Ben... I'm scared..." She admitted from the other side of the door.

"You don't have to be scared." He stood and picked up their back to dig through it for some gauze. He had a good stock of it and that would have to suffice for now, but he knew he was going to have to go out and get some things for her.

"But... I'm bleeding... inside..."

"That's because... uhm..." Now this he knew was going to be hard to explain... or rather embarrassing. "It just means that you're a woman now. See... you... uhm... birds! Birds..."

"Ben... what are you talking about?"

"Uhm... you know babies come from women, right?"

"I guess so."

"Well... every month a women's bodies prepare to hold babies... sort of like how a bird prepares a nest. Alright?" He lightly tapped his fingers against the door out of nervous habit. "Most of the time... there is no baby... so women's bodies shed the nest in order to make a new nest the next month. Except... these nests are... sort of... made of blood and flesh... but I guess that's obvious at this point."

"Why isn't there a baby...?"

"Uhm." He cursed under his breath because he didn't want to have this talk with a thirteen year old girl. "Well because... you... need... a male bird to... help... make an egg into a baby..."

"Oh." She seemed to have accepted that answer and he was so grateful that he didn't have to explain in full detail.

"Open up now... I have something for you so you don't bleed everywhere." He waited and then the door clicked and she opened it only partially to allow him to hand her the gauze. It wasn't perfect, but it would do for now. "I'm going to get you something better, but you have to work with that for now."

"Okay..." She sniffed lightly and took the rolls from him before backing back into the room and closing the door once more.

"Rey... you don't have to be sad... this is a good thing. Growing up... it's a good thing." He told her and then stepped back.

"It really hurts."

"I know. I'm sorry." He wished he could do something to ease her pain, but he couldn't. Not until he could get out and gather some things to trade for more supplies. "I'll be right back."

While she figured things out he started working on something for her to eat. While he knew she wasn't sick per say he made her some soup in hopes that it would at least help a little bit. By the time he finished it up and returned she seemed to have sorted things out because she was sitting near the little table in the center of the room.

He set a bowl down in front of her on the table and she gave it an odd look.

"Vaporator mushroom soup." He answered as he sat in front of her with his own bowl and dug in. "I know you're not sick, but... this will make you feel better."

Still Rey looked at it skeptically, but she reluctantly dug her spoon in, blew on it lightly and then took a bite... and she groaned in disgust. "Ewwww."

He burst into laughter at her reaction and that was the moment that she knew that Ben was well aware that these mushrooms tasted horrible and he was still having her eat them. She may have been more angry at him, but... she never really heard Ben laugh before and she didn't think she could be mad. After all he had gone through the trouble to make soup for her to try and make her feel better.

"Luke made me eat them when I was sick at the academy." He cleared things up for her to be aware he wasn't just being mean to her. He really did want her to feel better... he just... got a little entertainment out of it.

"I'm... kind of tired still..." she said softly as she pushed a few specks around in her bowl. She wasn't quite hungry with the horrible ache she had and all. "Can we just go back to bed until this stops?"

"Rey..." He started as he finished up his bowl. "You can't... sleep with me anymore."

"Why...? Is it because this whole thing is disgusting to you?"

"No. No... nothing like that... it's completely normal. The thing is... you're a woman now... women and men can't... sleep together. It would be... inappropriate." He shoved his empty bowl aside. "It's warm in here at night now anyways. There's no need for it."

"Why is it inappropriate?"

"It just... is."

"Why wasn't it inappropriate before then?"

"Because... you were just a kid. Now it's... different because you're a young woman."

"Why?"

"It just is." He hated the look on her face, but this was one issue that he absolutely would not budge on.

"I don't get any of this. None of it makes sense." Rey sighed and stared down in to the only half empty bowl in front of her. Normally she loved to eat all the foods that he prepared for her, but now... she just didn't feel like it at all.

"Yeah... I know. Growing up is hard."

"Does it get easier?"

"Ask me when I've figured that out." He was twenty three now and sometimes he still had no idea what he was doing and felt lost in the world, but he hoped that maybe someday he could figure it out. "Alright... you instruct me on the specifics and I'll make you a really comfortable bed... deal?"

"Mmm..." She gave way to a little smile. She couldn't pass up the offer to boss him around a little. "Deal."


	7. Day 2,975

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 2,975

Rey was facing a dilemma she realized as she watched Ben attempting to fix the problem with the water. The sink had stopped working and he hadn't been to happy about it. She knew how long it took him to get working water up here in the bridge. How he'd struggled to find all the right parts, but that was his dilemma... hers... was a completely different problem.

She had realized that she liked Ben. She really liked him. More so than she had ever liked anyone and she wasn't sure exactly what to do with the feelings. She had a sense of despair and hopelessness about her situation.

"What are you staring for, Rey? Do you need something?" He questioned as he had noticed her staring. Another thing she was terrified to do... she was afraid to look at him for too long... afraid that maybe he would know if she did.

"No." She answered quickly as possible. Maybe too quickly.

"You look sad..." He began and then his tone became teasing. "What's the matter? Does the little baby need to be swaddled?"

"Ben, I am not a baby." She slapped his arm in response to the teasing.

Right. That was exactly why she was so hopeless. Ben only saw her as a baby. Like she was his little sister. Dense and clueless she was sure that he wouldn't ever notice that she had feelings for him, but perhaps it was a good thing. She didn't know how he'd react. She wasn't sure if she wanted to know how he would react.

He let out a low, deep chuckle. Yet another thing she liked about him. His smile. His laugh and then there was that voice of his.

"Mmm. Maybe it's just... this piece right here..." He decided. "Can you hand me the pilex driver?"

Rey picked up the tool from the box and held it out to him. It was hard to keep a straight face when she felt his fingers graze along hers while he took it from her. It didn't mean anything to him, but to her... it was impossible to keep the tinge of pink from her cheeks. At least he wasn't paying attention to her.

There was a groaning in the pipes as he adjusted them and then the loud crack as the pipe exploded and sprayed water all over them both. The water came from an underground storage tank that he'd dragged out of the destroyer and being underground the water was absolutely freezing. It led to them both shouting.

"Turn it off!"

"I'm trying!" He hurriedly pushed himself out from behind the sink and then moved to the panel in the wall where he could shut off the water supply completely. Sitting back with a huff he brushed some wet hair from his face and then snatched up a towel for himself and the other he tossed into Rey's face.

"Ugh." Rey pulled the towel off her face. "I think you broke it."

"It was already broken. The pipes aren't exactly in the best shape." He didn't have the best materials to work with. "I think they rusted over. I'll have to see if I can dig up some in better shape."

"You're going to scavenge down in the ship again?"

"If we want water up here, yes." He stoop up and left to strip out of his shirt and change into a dry one. It left Rey trying to look anywhere but where he was standing.

"Do you have to?"

"How many times have I been down there? I'll be fine." He picked up a pack and slung it over his shoulder as he started out the door. "Don't forget to study. I want all your homework done by the time I get back."

"All of it?" Rey let out a whine.

"Yes. All of it." With that he was out the door and Rey was left to her own devices. It wasn't like he was going far, but she hated being left alone up here.

So she decided to pass the time and just focus on her homework while he was away so he wouldn't yell when she got back. She glanced back at the door and sighed. She was still facing the dilemma. Why did she have to like Ben in this way? It would be easier if things were like they were before, but they had changed through the years. For her at least.

Still they both held onto the hope that Luke would be back for them soon.


	8. Day 4,850

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 4,850

Four thousand eight hundred and fifty days. Six hundred and ninety three weeks. One hundred and fifty nine months. Rey added up that they had been here on the desert planet of Jakku for thirteen years. There wasn't much else to do, but add up time.

She wasn't bitter about the time they had spent here, but Ben had held out for so long and then he had reached his breaking point. She couldn't be sure when it had happened exactly, but he had change. He used to be warmer and then he had slowly become colder during their time here. He lost his temper more. He kept his distance from her.

He'd snapped at her the other day. Normally he had tried not to lose his temper with her, but she mentioned wondering when Luke would come back and he had told her that Luke was never coming back for them. To give up on that pipe dream.

On top of all that he'd even quit shaving completely and no matter how many little digs she got in about him looking just like Master Luke with his scruffy beard he didn't do anything to change it. He told her it was too much of a bother. That it would just grow back and he'd have to do it all over again. That was how she knew for certain that Ben really had lost all hope. He just didn't care anymore about things he normally would have.

She couldn't blame him. He had worked so hard to keep them alive for so long and now he was burnt out. She wished that she could do something for him. He had done so much for her and she wasn't sure what she could do to help him.

By now even she had lost hope that Luke would defeat the Sith and return for them, but then she wasn't so sure she minded. Being here with Ben wasn't the worst thing that could possibly happen to her and although she wanted to explore the galaxy... this was enough for her. She just wished it was enough for Ben.

Today he hadn't bothered to get up or go out. He was just lying there on his back, tossing a ball up into the air and catching it again. The temperature today was skyrocketing and she was glad that he wasn't going out.

"Ben, if you could leave here... where would you go?"

"I don't know..." He answered while tossing the ball up into the air. "Maybe my family's planet. New Alderaan. The planet of beauty, nature, poetry, philosophy, art, couture and cuisine."

He stated it as if it was some infomercial. She wondered if he really wanted to go there or not.

"You don't want to go home to your family?"

At that he caught the ball and stopped, let out a sigh and shook his head. "No."

She understood how he felt. She herself had been abandon by her own parents. Sometimes she felt the longing to know what it was like to have parents, but judging by Ben's relationship with his she guessed that maybe having parents wasn't so great. There would be times where she could feel his emotions.

She knew just how much he despised his father. How he hated him for leaving him and choosing smuggling over his family and how Ben was infuriated by his mother's willingness to tolerate it. The Sith took advantage of Ben's situation. He knew that Ben was emotionally vulnerable due to his family neglecting him and Snoke used that.

That was also a part of why Luke had sent him here with her. To spare him.

But... Snoke couldn't crawl inside of Ben's head anymore. She recalled that Luke told her she was like a lantern inside of his mind and she kept the shadows out. A good way to explain to a child why their bond kept Snoke out of his mind.

Ben was already so conflicted and so emotional over the fact that he felt so abandoned by his family that she couldn't imagine what would have happened to him if the Sith had kept crawling into his head and manipulating him. She suspected he wouldn't have done very well.

She also believed that it was a mercy that Ben had been spared from being a Jedi. Just being a padawan had been hard enough. He had been denied his sentience and nearly collapsed under the pressure of being something he wasn't.

"What would you do there?"

"I don't know. It doesn't matter. We're not getting off this rock."

"But what if-"

"We're not. Luke has forgotten about us. He doesn't care."

"Ben-"

"Which is fine. I don't care about him either." Sitting up he tossed the ball into the wall and then grabbed his bag to sling it over his shoulder as he stood up.

"Are you going to gather more parts?"

"Yes. It's too hot to work outside and I can't stand doing nothing. So I'll pick up a few things to trade."

"Can I come?"

He stopped at the door and glanced over his shoulder at her and contemplated the idea of her coming along. Sighing he turned to the side.

"Alright."

She could hardly believe that he had relented and quickly gathered up her gear so that she could go along with him. She doubted that he wanted to be kept waiting. It had been some time since she had last gone with him.

The first time he'd allowed it had been when she was sixteen. He told her that she was old enough to come along. It had been almost exciting to explore the underground remains of the massive ship, but also sad. There were still skeletons within the destroyer. Still in tattered uniform. Forever frozen in that moment. Forever trapped in the last thing that they were doing.

Most of it had been scavenged already, but Ben knew how to get into places that normal scavengers didn't. He had spent so much time studying ships. He'd always been interested in them. It also helped that he had the force to help get some doors open that would be otherwise tightly sealed. Even if he shouldn't be using it.

"This way." He said as he carefully slipped between the half open door and the wall. It was a tight fit for him, but he made it. Rey didn't quite have the same problem. It was much easier for her to get through. "The panel should have a lot of electronics that we can trade for supplies."

"Are they worth a lot?"

"Sometimes. They're not easy to get for most others. Not without frying them. A lot of these scavengers can't take them out without frying one of most of the components, but... nothing a force user can't solve with a little manipulation." He set to work prying the panel off so he could get to the parts underneath.

"What happened to being forbidden from using the force inappropriately?"

"Well... I hardly think this is inappropriate. It's helping us survive... and besides... this planet is like a vacuum... nothing could ever detect any use of the force here."

After putting a little muscle into it the panel popped off with a puff of dust and sand that covered his face, got into his lungs and had him coughing. Rey grimaced because she knew how much Ben hated sand.

"Here..." Rey reached into her bag, grabbed out a cloth and poured a bit of water onto it so she could reach up to carefully wipe away the dust and sand. He froze there. Didn't move an inch. Perhaps because he was startled or maybe because he really hated sand. She lightly brushed the damp cloth down over his face and down the corner of his chin a few times, but she realized it wasn't dust, but rather tiny flecks of stress in the corners of his beard. "You've got some grey."

"Stop..." He took a step back from her so suddenly she was a bit thrown off balance, almost fell, but he caught her arm to steady her. "We... need to get this work done. It's dirty work so worry about cleaning up later."

He stepped around her and proceeded to start pulling some of the better tech off, but she was confused. His behavior seemed... strange to her. She didn't question him. Simply moved to the opposite side to gather what she could and from there they worked in silence to get enough to trade for supplies.

That awkward silence continued even after they finished up and headed out and she decided from that moment on that she wouldn't try to get close to him again.


	9. Day 4,900

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 4,900

_Ripped apart and scavenged._

 

Ben stood there silently staring at what was left of the Vaporator that he had spent so much time on. It had been ripped open, gutted and stripped for parts. Seeing the remains left him completely devastated that everything he had worked so hard for had been ripped apart ruthlessly and without a thought for those that relied on it.

 

From her spot in the doorway she watched as he slowly clenched his fists and the way that he started shaking as the rage started to build up inside of him. Rey knew better than to get in the way of his fits and so when he let out a snarl to rival a Corellian sand panther and kicked a panel of metal across the sand she kept her distance from him.

 

In fact keeping her distance from Ben seemed to be all that she had been doing lately. His temperment had flared to an all time high. He was so unstable and Rey wanted to help. She really did, but she wasn't sure how to go about it. 

 

She wasn't afraid of him hurting her of course. That was one thing she was absolutely certain that Ben would never do. What she was afraid of was not allowing him to get some of his inner turmoil out. It was the reason she let him have his fits.

 

"Ben-"

 

"What?!" He snapped, but he realized almost immediately that he had gone too far and felt guilty. "I... Rey... I'm sorry..."

 

"I know." 

 

"I have to go.... trade for some replacement parts or we're going to run out of water." He set his hands on his hips and looked down at the ground because he couldn't look at her when he knew how wrong he had been to snap at the only person he had in this world.

 

"Can I come with?" 

 

"Uhm..." He rubbed a hand along his beard and then lifted his gaze up to her. "Yeah. Okay. We'll take your speeder then?"

 

"Only if I drive."

 

"Mmm." He dropped his hand back down to his side, but he didn't argue with her. Rey was old enough that she didn't need him to protect her anymore and she knew how to defend herself well enough. 

 

Her hidden speeder was something that Rey was quite proud of. She built it all by herself and even gathered all the parts on her own. Sometimes she was amazed that Ben allowed her to go down into the destroyer on her own, but occasionally he would. He was allowing her to have some space to grow and become independent from him. She appreciated that Ben gave her space.

 

Rey pulled her speeder out from the overhang of the large engine of the destroyer where they kept it hidden under a tarp and waited for Ben to do his best to climb on behind her. The second she knew he was on she pushed the throttle down and felt Ben nearly fall off and grumble something under his breath about her being reckless.

 

It took awhile to travel Pilgrim's Road, past The Sitter to get to Niima Outpost, but much quicker than it would be on foot.

 

Upon arriving Ben jumped down from the back and made his way over with some goods that he could trade for and a list of the things he needed to repair and replace what had been stolen from them.

 

As Ben expected the prices were ridiculously unfair, but there was no other choice. He had to get these working parts for them to be able to survive. A small price to pay really... for drinking water. 

 

As he expected Plutt gave him a terrible deal. Took too much for too little. For a moment he feared that he may not have brought enough to trade with such unfair prices, but somehow he had just enough. Or more like... Plutt knew this was all he had and was taking every last thing he could get from him.

 

"Hand it over girly." A man shouted and Ben glanced over his shoulder just in time to see the man take the business end of Rey's staff to the gut.

 

"Not bloody likely!" She responded as she brought it down over his head next.

 

He couldn't help the slight smile that came over his face. That was his girl. He knew that she could handle herself and that was why he took his time gathering up the rest of the supplies, but... even if he knew this it seemed some young scavenger didn't quite get that.

 

"I was going to help, but it looks like you have it under control." The boy stated in amazement and then smiled. "So it's true when they say the most beautiful things are also the most deadly."

 

"Beautiful...?" Rey's face heated up at the complement and she nervously tucked a strand of hair behind her ear as she straightened up.

 

"He's out cold." The boy nudged the thief with his boot. "You may not need help defending yourself, but.... do you maybe need help with anything else? Or we could have... lunch together? My treat? Maybe watch the stars later?"

 

For some reason Ben felt a twinge in his chest and then the heat of rage. He immediately grabbed the bag Plutt gave him and slung it over his shoulder as he made his way over to Rey and grabbed her by the wrist.

 

"We're going." He told her.

 

"What? Why?" Rey asked completely confused as to why he was suddenly demanding they leave. She had taken care of the danger. "Let go, Ben... it hurts."

 

"She asked you to let her go." The boy tried to valiantly stand up, but Ben tensed up, squared his shoulders and turned on the much shorter boy. The kid looked to be nineteen... Rey's age and in his youth was much smaller than he was. The boy whimpered audibly when he realized the size difference between them, but despite fear still tried to be some sort of white knight. "You should... let her go... like she asked..."

 

Ben knew he shouldn't be so mad... he should... let her go and make her own choices, but he couldn't. He knew he should, but he just couldn't let her go with this kid for lunch. He knew what would happen between them if he did.

 

"The girl... she belongs to me..." Ben had no idea what had possessed him to say what he did, but it had earned a disgusted look from the boy and anger from Rey.

 

"Ben!" Rey tried to twist free from his brusing grip, but her physical strength was no match for his. "What is wrong with you?"

 

"There's nothing wrong with me! You were left in my charge and I'm not letting you run off with some kid you don't know. End of discussion." He was snapping again and he couldn't help it, but this time she would get no apology from him because he didn't believe he was wrong.

 

He wasn't wrong. He tugged her along with him back to the speeder despite her struggles and despite the stares and glares he was receiving from some of the people there. He was sure it looked bad on his end because Constable Zuvio looked about ready to step in.

 

This time he didn't let her drive. Just pulled her onto the speeder and left the outpost with the supplies as quickly as he could. The last thing he needed was trouble with the constable on top of everything else that he had to worry about.

 

It was an understatement to day that Rey was angry with him. She didn't speak to him the entire ride back nor did she speak with him when they arrived back at their home.

 

By the time they got back it was dark. Too late to begin repairs and so that left them both sitting in silence together. He wished that it wasn't late. He would love to get to work and put some distance between them, but it was late and too cold.

 

"Is it going to be like this all night? I had hoped to get a little help fixing the vaporator." He thought it was worth a try to talk to her. Even if he doubted that she would have an answer for him.

 

She didn't of course. She was good at this game. Not speaking to him. Ignoring him. It almost drove him insane, but on the outside he forced himself to remain calm. Pretend that it wasn't affecting him as deeply as it was.

 

"I wouldn't be mad if you weren't so shirty!"

 

"He wanted to sleep with you! I saw it inside of his head! Of course I wasn't about to let you run off with him and be taken advantage of." He raised his voice, because she started it and he was right about this whole thing. 

 

"So? You and I used to sleep together all the time!"

 

"No!" He pressed a hand over his eyes and let out a groan of exasperation. This was the one thing that he had failed to teach her. "Not... not like that..."

 

"Well what then?"

 

"You know there are differences between us... right?"

 

"Obviously." 

 

"I mean... physicals differences."

 

There was a long pause.

 

"Sort of." Rey answered apprenhensively.

 

While he had explained what growing into womanhood was he had never had the heart to explain to her all the gritty details of what happened between men and women or how they were different. He'd always wanted to protect her from all of that. To preserve her innocence perhaps, but now... she needed to know. If not boys like that would take advantage of her.

 

Letting out a low sigh he stood up and dug around for the datapad so that he could turn off the childproof lock on it and search up the information that she needed to learn. Best to let her read than trying to explain it himself.

 

"Come here and I'll show you." He said with reluctance. 

 

There was an awkward silence between them and he shifted restlessly until Rey finally got up and came to sit next to him, but he moved so that he was sitting behind her because really he couldn't look at her face to face while he showed her something like this.

 

From where he sat behind her so that he could watch over her shoulder he handed over the datapad with the education video he had pulled up and silently let her learn. It was perhaps the most uncomfortable moment to have ever passed between the two of them.

 

Even Rey with her extensive vocabulary was rendered speechless. 

 

"Oh... that's... what you meant by... a man helping with..." Seemed to be the only surprised sound that she could manage. "So then he... wanted to have a baby?"

 

"No." He shook his head slowly even if she couldn't see it. "Sometimes people do it for fun."

 

"Fun?" Rey didn't quite understand how that could be.

 

"It feels good." The answer hadn't come out quite as calmly as he would have liked. Much as he tried to keep his breathing under control he knew that it had increased considerably. The price of sitting so close to Rey and watching a video like that. Even if it was only meant for educational purposes and wasn't particularly graphic it still had his mind wandering. 

 

"How would you know?" 

 

"I had to listen to my parents enjoying it often enough." He answered with a sniff. He hated thinking about them and their disgusting habits, but he'd heard enough to know it wasn't unpleasant.

 

Rey turned off the datapad and leaned back against his chest with a sigh. If he wasn't mistaken he distinctly detected some disappointment from her. Though in regards to what he wasn't entirely sure. It wasn't exactly easy to try and focus in on what was bothering her... especially when she was leaned up against his chest like that.

 

There was a reason he didn't touch her or allow her to touch him at all. He couldn't stand it when she touched him... brushed up against him by mistake or he happened to mistakenly touch her. It nearly drove him out of his mind.

 

She turned to the side to look up at him and he froze because he realized just how close they were. He wasn't sure what to do. How to escape this situation he found himself in. Or more... he wasn't sure he wanted to. He dared to risk leaning in closer to her... even closer still until his lips just barely grazed the corner of her mouth and-...

 

Rey burst into a fit of giggling and shoved his face away from hers, rubbing at her cheek and leaving him completely confused.

 

"Your beard tickles." 

 

In all her innocence Rey really had no idea of his intentions. That the last thing he was trying to do was tickle her. He let out a breath and then quickly stood up. Now she was the one left in confusion.

 

"Go to bed. We have to be up early. That vaporator isn't going to fix itself." 

 

With those words he dropped down into his own bed as she returned to hers and from there they went their separate ways for the night. All the while he scolded himself for almost having made such a foolish mistake.


	10. Day 4,901

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 4,901

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter earns it's rating. With darker themes as well.

"Almost there..." From under the vaporator Ben held his hand out. "Bonding tape."

"Right here." Rey pressed it into his open hand and watched as he started putting in the finishing touches.

They had been working since early morning and fortunately the sun had made it's way around and they had some shade now under the bridge of the destroyer. Though while the heat had been hottest Ben had at some point taken his shirt off and tossed it onto the tool box leaving Rey blushing furiously and trying to look at anything, but him.

Now however he couldn't see that she was staring and she felt safe enough to admire. It dawned on her just how strong Ben really was. He'd spend so much time working to keep them both alive that she doubted anyone here was nearly as strong as he was.

"There. Just have to tighten this last bolt and we're set." He muttered under his breath.

Rey wasn't paying attention to any of the things he was saying of course. She was a bit distracted. It was his fault too. He had chosen to forgo a shirt while he worked due to the heat and now she couldn't focus on anything other than the ways that he had really changed over the years. He was no longer a scrawny boy. He was a full grown man.

She watched the shift of his muscles below the skin as he worked and out of some strange sense of curiosity she dropped a hand down onto his stomach to trace along the lines. A faint tremor ran through his body was she touched him and she wondered why his body reacted that way to a touch.

"What are you doing...?" He asked in a low, deep rumble.

His skin was much softer than she would have imagined. For some reason she had always thought that a man's skin would be hard and rough. It wasn't either of those things. His skin was soft, but beneath his muscles felt hard. Not quite rocky as it had some give when pressed down on, but close.

She found the thin trail of hair that disappeared below his belt. The second she traced over the spot he dropped the wrench and it busted him in the nose with a sickening crunch. He quickly pulled himself out from underneath the vaporator.

"Ben!" She wondered if he'd managed to break his nose, but as he stood up and clenched his fists at his side she noted there was no blood or crooked twist to it. "Are you alright?"

"Fine." He took a breath and let it out in a long sigh as he grabbed his shirt, shook out some sand and pulled it on over his shoulders. He didn't bother to close it up in the front and was still essentially bare chested.

It was just too hot to close it up all the way.

"It's not like you to lose your grip on something." Rey mused and he huffed in response.

It seemed he was in one of those moods again.

"It looks like everything is working again... do you want to head up and tell me if the water turns on alright?" He rubbed a hand along his scruffy beard and let out another huff as he turned his back to her.

"Okay..." Rey responded slowly as she stood up and dusted herself off. "Are you mad?"

"Mmm. Mad isn't the word I'd use for it..."

That only confused her even more. If he wasn't angry with her she wondered why he was acting so strangely all of a sudden. This kept happening between them and she couldn't bring herself to understand what exactly had changed between them.

Before she had the chance to ask a speeder pulled up and Ben grew tense as he watched the two men jump off of it. The two men stood by the speeder and spoke for several minutes and then proceeded to approach them.

"What do you want?" Ben spoke up and placed his hands at his hips while taking a step closer to the two.

"Looking for salvage." The larger of the two spoke up and Ben frowned because... that voice sounded familiar to him.

"There's nothing here for you. Go back where you came from."

"I see plenty right behind you. Can't keep a whole destroyer to yourself."

"This is my land. I want you off."

"You don't protect what's yours all to well... seeing as I managed to get myself some salvage the other night."

"You..." Ben glanced behind him to realize these two were the ones to have stripped the parts off the vaporator and he started to step forward, about to strangle the life out of the man.

Before he even got the change the man pulled a blaster from over his shoulder.

"Ah! I wouldn't do that if I were you... here, boy. Take it." The man pulled down the scarf covering his face as he handed the blaster over to the other that stood next to him to let him keep it trained on them. "No hard feelings... it wasn't personal. Thought it was abandoned."

Clearly a lie, but Ben now knew where he recognized where he had seen this man before. He was the same man from years back that wanted Rey. He should have killed him then... and now not having done that was coming back to haunt him.

"Rey... go inside..." He called over his shoulder.

"But, Ben..."

" _Ben_?" The man narrowed his eyes as he looked from one to the other and then he let out a laugh as he came to realize it as well. "I remember you. You're not a boy any longer are you? I almost didn't recognize you under all that scruff."

"Go away." Although Ben knew he was in no position to say it he still had to try.

"You got bigger, but you didn't get much smarter did you? Still trying to order me around... but the constable isn't around to protect you now."

If he didn't have a gun trained on him... he'd have ripped him limb from limb. Instead he was hit in the face... in the stomach and as he doubled over the man brought a knee up into his side.

"Stop!" Rey rushed forward about to help, but the man saw her attempt and to keep Ben disabled decided on a low blow and kneed him in the groin. It was a direct shot.

It didn't feel like much at first... just an impact, but he knew exactly what was coming. It was agony. Like a migraine deep in his groin that slowly started to spread up into his stomach. It hurt so badly that all he could do was curl into a ball and struggle not to paint the sand with his vomit.

Through the intensely mind-numbing, dull ache he noted that Rey also dropped and realized that she must have felt his pain. He would have felt bad that she had to suffer through it with him, but he couldn't even think about anything except for how much it hurt.

"Ooo... that'll have you pissin' blood." Now the man turned his attention to Rey. He was clearly curious as to why the girl dropped at the same time Ben did. He slowly approached Rey with a predatory stare and then dropped down to straddled her.

"Dad!" The young man with the blaster stepped forward.

"Don't worry... you'll get a turn, boy." It was all too easy it seemed and the scavenger wasn't about to question this odd gift. Rey would have fought back, if not for the disabling pain she shared with Ben.

"That's not the point! We can't do this!" He took a step forward.

It was then that Ben shifted somewhat, he wanted to yell. Tell the bastard to get off of her, but he couldn't find words. His breathing increased and his muscles tensed up. He had to force himself to get through the pain to get up.

The young man was too busy trying to talk some sense into his father who was more interested in pulling out his knife, about to just shred Rey's clothes. It was why the young man didn't turn until it was too late...

Ben threw a handful of sand up into his eyes and even through the mind-numbing pain he charged forward like a rabid animal and tackled the man on top of Rey so hard they both crashed a good distance away from her.

With all the strength that he had built up throughout the years it only took one decisive blow to draw blood. He drew back his fist and struck him again and again and again... the man's nose broke under the pressure before he grabbed the scavenger's skull between two hands and lifted it up enough to slam it as hard into the ground as he could.

The scavenger was unconscious by this point.

"Ben... stop!" Rey who had finally managed to figure out how to separate her pain from his was struggling to get up, to stop Ben. "It's enough!"

But it wasn't. It wasn't enough to quell his rage. After what he tried to do to Rey nothing in this world could ever satisfy his rage other than this man's death.

Perhaps he was no better than an animal as he beat the man's face in... frothing at the mouth with blood splattered across his own face he must have looked like one. His gaze shifted and he noted the large stone to his right.

It didn't even need a second thought. He grabbed it, felt Rey's hands clawing at his shoulder in an effort to stop him, but it was no good. He slammed it into the man's face. He had likely been killed earlier, but it wasn't good enough for him. He continued to beat his face in until his skull collapsed in on itself... and even then he kept beating him until he was doing nothing more than crushing broken bits of skull and brain into the sand.

Only then was he satisfied, but the sound of a blaster dropping as the boy realized his father had been completely brutalized drew his attention.

As his eyes landed on the boy the poor kid let out a cry of fear, scrambled back... tripped in the sand and then hurried to gather himself and get up so that he could run as far as he could get.

Ben quickly forced himself up off the ground and slid to his knees in the sand to pick up the blaster and take aim at the kid. He had no intentions of letting him get away.

"Ben, no!"

Just as he pulled the trigger his hands were knocked up, sending the blaster bolt up and into the blue sky.

"What are you thinking?! We can't let him go!" He made this mistake once... he wouldn't make it again.

"He didn't want any part of it!" Rey yelled back just as fiercely. She held firmly onto the blaster, because she knew. She could sense it in him that he still wanted to kill the boy.

"You're really going to let him go after what he tried to do to you?!"

"He didn't do it!" She knew exactly what had almost happened, but it didn't matter now because it didn't. "Nothing happened. We're fine. So please... give it to me..."

He glanced between her and the blaster and all the way to the boy in the distance. He knew he could still make the shot, but he knew if he did it would put them both in a bad place. It didn't help he'd just bashed a man's brains out right in front of her.

Reluctantly he relinquished the blaster and Rey hurried to get it away from him, tossed it towards the speeder that had been left behind.

"What if he comes back?" He asked slowly as he once again noticed the terrible ache after being hit and there was nothing to distact him from it now.

"He won't." Rey answered with certainty. For once she knew that the boy hadn't wanted anything to do with this and that he wasn't going to come back.

"Did you let him go because you like him still? He was here to-"

"He was here because of that monster that doesn't deserve to be called a father. I thought that you of all people would understand that someone's parents don't define them."

He inhaled sharply at her words. They had bite to them and he found he couldn't think up a response to that. It was... true. Though his father wasn't a disgusting monster like the one he had killed... he was a good for nothing drunk that had run out on his family.

"Go up... I'm going to clean this mess up..." He would take care of everything.

For once... Rey listened to him, despite a moments hesitation.

Turning he went to retrieve the body, loaded it up onto the speeder and then he tied down both the body and the accelerator so that the speeder would get as far from here as possible with the mess. He certainly wasn't going to take the time to give him a burial. He didn't think the monster deserved it.

For once Rey didn't have an objection. He could feel that she was upset... more shaken than she seemed. Right now all she was doing was pretending that she was fine, but he could tell that this had scared her.

It was hard to hide things from one another when they were so closely bound.

He kicked sand up over the mess of blood to cover it up before he headed inside. Maybe it should have affected him more that he had just killed someone, but he couldn't bring himself to regret it or feel bad. Not after what that man had tried to do. He was glad he had killed him.

It was just the matter of Rey that concerned him.

When he pushed the door open slowly and stepped into the bridge he noticed that she seemed to be waiting for him. Though she had indeed been waiting they didn't exchange any words.

All he could do was make his way over to his bed and try to make himself comfortable. He was still hurting after that knee he'd taken. The most he could do was try to lie down and sleep for a time, but all he could do was toss and turn.

Eventually he realized there was no way he was going to get in rest with the amount of discomfort that he was in. He shifted with his hand between his legs, tried to make himself more comfortable... easy some of the pain by adjust things. None of it helped.

It seemed Rey had noticed as well because she approached him with a small bowl and a cloth. Sitting in front of him she reached out with the wet cloth and wiped at the split in his lip where his face taken most of the impact.

"How are you feeling?"

"Bruised... sore... swollen..." It was when he lifted his gaze from his lap up to see the way her jaw had dropped that he realized. "Oh... you meant my face... t-that too."

"It's fine." Rey brushed off the misunderstanding and pressed the damp cloth into the corner of his bread to clean away some of the dried, flaking blood.

"Are you... angry that I killed him?"

"No."

The honest answer, perhaps surprised them both, but both knew that the man deserved to die and if he had been allowed to live he would have come back worse than before. There had been little choice.

She dropped the cloth back into the water, watched as it was tinted with a light pink and then brought it back to his face to remove the last traces of blood. As she trailed the cloth down along his neck she watched the way he closed his eyes and tilted his chin up slightly. There was a little sound that escaped him before he could stop it and it almost reminded her of a loth-cat.

Grouchy... sure of himself... secretly liked affection even though he pretended he was indifferent to it. There was no doubt in her mind... Ben was like a big loth-cat.

Once the last traces of blood were gone she dropped the cloth off to the side where it was out of the way and curled her fingers underneath his chin. As expected he made a sound akin to a purr. She brushed through his beard, entangled her fingers in it and pulled down to get his attention.

"Ben... can I shave you?" Rey asked softly as she reached over for the pack near the bed and dragged it over towards them.

He slowly opened his eyes and took note of the pack before shifting his gaze over to her and then back again.

"Alright."

Rey raised a brow as she didn't actually expect him to have actually agreed, but now that he had agreed she wasn't quite sure where to start. She opened up the pack and removed the sharp blade and the shaving cream.

He closed his eyes again and sat quite patiently for her as she smeared a glob of white onto his face and rubbed it into his beard. She suspected it was just because he liked being touched.

Turning it over in her hand she stared at the back of his jaw and slowly slid the blade down towards his chin. It was just a little scary because she was afraid that she might cut him with how sharp it was. A detail she had overlooked. She hadn't expected she would worry as much as she was.

She brushed her thumb over the smooth stripe of skin she left behind with the blade. She carefully brought the blade up again and made another just under that and before long she managed to shave one half of his face.

Taking a moment she surveyed his face. It was strange. It had been so long since she had last seen him without the scruff.

"Maybe I'll only do half and leave it like that..." She teased and watched the faint twitch at the corner of his mouth. The only indication of a smile.

She tilted her head to the side slightly and then reached to turn his face so she could do the other side. The more she did the more confident she was in her abilities until she reached the last of the scruff on his chin.

It was nice to see his face again, she mused. He looked perhaps ten years younger now that he wasn't buried under that bushy beard. Setting the blade aside she brought her other hand up to wipe away some of the stray shaving cream. It took a moment to realize he no longer had his eyes closed and was now watching her closely.

For some strange reason she found that that fire that seemed to burn in his eyes as he looked at her made her stomach twist in a strange way.

It was that feeling that led to her pressing her mouth against his. He made a little sound as he returned the kiss. Although sweet and gentle were not words she might have normally put in a sentence with him... that was exactly what his kiss was. It was only when air became a necessity that she broke from him, struggled to catch her breath. As if he'd stolen what was in her lungs away.

"Rey." It was the way he said her name that had her leaning into him to kiss him again, only this time much deeper.

She tasted both the aftershave and under that the faintest hint of the coffee he so much liked to drink to keep him going in the morning. She had tried it once... but spit it out... Ben had laughed and told her it was an acquired taste. Now she found when it was on his tongue that it wasn't nearly as terrible as she recalled.

Under that though there was the coppery taste of blood. It reminded her that he had been hurt. Reminded her of everything she'd tried to forget today. In the end that was more what made her pull away.

"You're hurt." She said softly, dropping her hands away from him.

"No... I'm fine..." He assured her as he inched forward, wanting nothing more than to kiss her again, but he noted that it didn't seem to be that he had some minor pains that was bothering. "What's really wrong?"

Rey hesitated though and he for the first time resorted to physical comforts by reached out to stoke his fingers down her cheek gently. It was strange for the both of them, because they didn't tend to show affection physically. Mostly because he put distance between them.

"I just... I was thinking... about... what almost happened."

While she initially wanted to put it behind her because nothing had actually happened it had still scared her. She certainly didn't want to let Ben know she was afraid.

Still it was enough that he immediately dropped his hand away from her because he feared that perhaps it was an uncomfortable reminder that a ruthless brute had put his hands on her.

"I took care of him... he can't hurt you."

"But there could always be someone else, right?"

"...No..." Though his words were clearly a strained lie. He knew just as well as she did that there would always be someone bad out there.

"What if it does happen?"

"I'll protect you." He reassured immediately.

"But what if it does?" She repeated her concern.

"Rey, I'm not going to let that happen." He absolutely would not let that happen. He was going to protect her. "You saw what I'll do to them. And it was my fault he got the upper hand... you had to deal with my pain... if you hadn't... you would have bested him yourself."

"If it does..." Rey continued, seeming to have ignored his words all together. "I would rather it be you."

There was a long drawn out silence between them as he tried to process her words.

"What?"

"You heard me."

"Uhm..." He sat back a little and ran a hand through his hair with a nervous exhale. "Look... Rey... I... I know that what happened scared you, but I promise... I swear to you it will never happen again. It was just... a... a fluke."

"Ben..."

"Something... something like this you should only share it with someone... special. Someone that you trust. Someone you really love. I'm not..." He couldn't bring himself to finish that sentence. Couldn't admit aloud that she didn't love him.

The best thing he could do was stand up and make his way into the other room and turn on the shower. He needed to to just relax under some warm water... he couldn't stand to be around her now... it was too much.

Instead of thinking too much on it he turned, flipped the lid of the toilet up, leaned his arm on the wall and focused on trying to go. It was difficult and painful after that hit he'd taken and his face screwed up into a grimace... and though there was some relief it burned and he noted that there was a red tint to it.

" _Haar'chak_." He cursed under his breath in a foreigner language.

"We're not done yet." Rey said as she pushed the partially closed door open all the way and he let out another curse under his breath.

"Rey!" He scolded, hurrying to adjust things so she didn't get an eyeful of more than she bargained for by coming in here so abruptly.

"You're wrong." She still pressed on the subject even though she knew she caught him at a bad time, but in her defense he had left the door halfway open.

"I'm what?" Really he wasn't in the mood to fight with her. Especially not now. "D-does the unspoken rule of not barging in here not count all of a sudden?"

"You're wrong." Rey said again and once he was covered properly he turned around to face her with a huff.

"What? What am I wrong about?" No. He really wasn't in the mood for this.

"Everything-" Rey took a step forward, about to scold him further for the things he had said a moment ago that had been so far off base when she noticed the drops of blood on the floor and her gaze quickly lifted to the red tint to the water. "Ben, are you-"

"It's nothing." He slammed the lid shut so she couldn't see anymore.

"You're really hurt..."

"I'm fine." Again he brushed it off because the last thing he needed was her knowing how badly he was hurting. It would pass. He was sure of it. "What were you saying I was wrong about?"

She didn't answer. This time she had no words. She was more concerned that he was more hurt than he had let on. If she had been allowing herself to feel their bond a bit more she might have noticed, but she'd cut it off at some point for the sake of self-preservation.

Turning away she grabbed a cloth from the stand next to the towels and turned on the water as cold as she could get it and... when she finally turned back towards him she pressed a hand to his chest and forced him back to sit down on the closed lid.

Though she had a moments hesitation at this she curled the fingers of her other hand in the waist of his pants and pulled it back just enough to slip the cold cloth down then to where he needed it most. His reaction was to close his eyes and let out a breath of relief because the cold really did make it feel so much better.

It took a moment to register everything properly of course. He was tired and hurt. So while the cloth was very welcome to sooth the pain... it clicked suddenly in his mind that her hand was on him... touching him where he'd only ever dreamed of having her touch up until now... with only a thin, cold cloth between them.

"Anyway... you're wrong." Rey began again.

"About...?" His voice lowered considerably as he dropped a hand down over hers.

"In your assumption that you're not someone special to me." She answered while glancing down between them. "I do respect you. Ben, you're my whole world."

"Rey..." He was startled. Never in a million years had he thought that she might ever feel that way towards him.

"I love you." She admitted so quietly he almost didn't hear it. So quietly he knew that she second though this because she was afraid of what his answer might be.

"Sweetheart..." He tilted his chin up to kiss her, slow and lingering. "I love you. So much. I love you so, so much."

"Then why-" She didn't need to finish the question. He understood.

"Because I was afraid." He admitted softly. "You've always been so innocent... I didn't want to take that away from you. I've wanted to protect it. Even from myself. I'm the man... and it's my responsibility to take care of you."

"Why would it change anything?"

"It just does."

"Show me." Her request was met with a moment of silence. He was debating. Having an internal war with himself before realizing that it was really too late. They toed the line already.

"Come get cleaned up with me." He reached forward to unclip her belt and let it drop off to the side. "Okay?"

"Okay." It took her a moment to find her words. She swallowed with difficulty and helped him undress while he helped her.

It occurred to her that they had never seen one another completely undressed. He had always given her the privacy that she needed. It made her a little nervous now to think that there would be nothing to hide anymore.

She caught the edge of his shirt, nails scraping lightly across his abdomen and chest as she pulled it up over his head. She felt the faint shiver as her nails grazed his skin and made a mental note for later that he liked it.

Now it was her turn, although her clothing falling away revealed more than his and she moved to cross her arms to cover herself. He merely smiled at her, but didn't tell her that she couldn't. Instead he reached a hand up to her cheek and leaned in for another brief kiss.

"You're beautiful, Rey, but if you're nervous you don't have to show me everything. Not yet... but I hope you will later? Maybe when you're not so uneasy."

Maybe she took it as a challenge... she dropped her arms down, but reached forward for the waist of his pants, hesitated for a second, watched him tilt his head and then he placed his hands over hers to let her know he was hardly as embarrassed. In fact he seemed quite proud of himself. Almost arrogant as she tugged them downwards.

Except she grimaced as she saw him.

"You weren't kidding about being bruised."

"I have interests other than a little bruising." He curled his fingers into the remaining fabric covering her and finished undressing her as well.

He didn't seem nervous and so she warmed up to the idea of being undressed in front of him as he was with her.

From there he backed her up into the shower with him. The pleasantly warm water a result of a lot of hard work on a heater. With their combined efforts they had been able to provide themselves with a lot of luxuries they wouldn't have if they didn't have each other.

Reaching past her he grabbed a jar of shampoo and gathered some into his palm before reached up to run it through her hair with his fingers. It was soothing to have him taking care of her like this. He used to wash her hair for her when she was little, but eventually stopped as she grew older. He had tried very hard to keep things appropriate between them... perhaps a little too hard.

As much as he joked about Luke coddling her... it was Ben that coddled her. She'd been having strange feelings for him for years since she became a woman and she hadn't understood what they were. He hadn't explained them to her. Not until just the other day and all because he wanted her to stay an innocent little girl. Not corrupted by the world.

"Why... aren't you nervous at all?" She asked closing her eyes as he rinsed the soap from her hair.

"Who said I'm not?" He answered her question with another question. It would be a lie if he said he wasn't nervous. It was just that he had so much practice hiding what he was feeling. In reality he was terrified.

As he finished rinsing her hair he made sure to brush any loose strands from her face and that was when she peeked an eye open to make sure he was done.

"You? You're afraid?" She almost didn't believe it, but he reached down for her hand and lifted it to place against his chest, near his heart. She felt the speedy pound beneath her palm and realized he wasn't just saying it. He was scared too.

It was her turn to reach for the jar to gather up a glob of shampoo and reached up to smooth it into his hair. One corner of his mouth turned upwards and she realized how much she truly loved that crooked smile of his. How much she loved him.

"Mmm." The little rumble of sound escaped him as he lowered his chin for her to reach better.

"Big loth-cat." She couldn't help, but to smile in return as she teased him. Though he really didn't seem to mind. There was no word of complaint as she initially thought there might be when she made the comment. "You're just going to take that?"

"Mmmhmm." He let out a little content sigh as she started to rinse the soap away, lightly scraping her nails through his hair.

Once he was sure it was all out and his eyes were in no danger he opened them for a second to gauge distance before leaning forward to kiss her, but... she turned her head to the side with a sound he was quite sure was a mischievous little giggle and escaped the shower to snatch up a towel and leave him there.

" _Rey_..." He turned the water off and stepped out, only to be hit in the face with a towel. It made him let out a little huff as he pulled it down from his face and used it to dry off, but he followed her out only to find her in his bed.

He dropped to sit next to her, only to change the air between them as he buried his face in the side of her neck to press as many kisses into the skin as she'd let him get away with. She let him get away with more than he expected she was going to. He would take whatever she would give to him.

It seemed she was willing to give it all and so he teased her with little nips and brief, soothing licks over the bites he left behind. He wanted to mark her. To let everyone know that she belong to him.

Rey didn't mind at all... she entangled her fingers in his hair and tilted her head back to allow him all the space he wanted to work with. She felt his hands drop down to her thighs, press one off to the side so that he could move between them. That startled her, but it was what she had asked for.

"You sure you want to do this, sweetheart?" He asked, gently stroking his fingers down along hip... the outside of her thigh... to her knee. It wasn't a matter of being ready. She was more than ready. He could feel she was, but he needed to ask.

"Yes." There was a slight shake to her voice, but she was sure of what she wanted. So he pressed her back into his pillows, pulled the blanket partially over them and in general tried to make everything as pleasant for her as possible.

"Comfortable?"

"Mmhm." She reached up to stroke her fingers along his jawline as she stared up at him with adoration. He was really trying to see to her needs... taking care of her... just as he'd always done. She didn't care what anyone else said. Ben was a good man.

He was still taking some time and as she trailed her fingers over his chin she traced back up the other side of his jaw where the sunset cast an orange glow over his skin. She wondered how he had resisted for so long when he had clearly wanted her just as badly.

She supposed that this was bound to happen sooner or later... them giving into their feelings... the truth wasn't something that could stay hidden forever.

"Are you sure?" She hadn't thought to ask. He was the one that was hurt and she didn't want to hurt him further. "You're still hurt."

"Rey," He deadpanned. "I could break every bone in my body and still want you... and... somehow find a way to make it work."

"Of course you would..." It was hard not to smile at his dry sense of humor. Not a lot of people tended to get it, but she could always pick up on it.

"No more games, okay?"

"Okay."

She knew they were beyond games... beyond talk... beyond teasing. He was running low on patients. He had waited for so long after all. He shifted between her thighs, pressed forward and his lips parted on a low exhale.

He looked surprised. Surprised because as much as he had dreamed about it he had never thought it could possibly feel this good.

" _Oh_." He breathed and something along the lines of a deep, groan rumbled in his chest. That sound that came out of him did something to her insides that she couldn't explain, but despite that it still burned. It burned in a strange way she couldn't exactly describe, but he was pressing forward still and she quickly pressed her hand against his lower stomach to stop him. It made him freeze... made him realized she was in pain."I'm sorry... do... do you want me to stop?"

"No... no I just need a minute..."

"It hurts?"

"Sort of..." She didn't quite want to say it hurt, because while it did... it also didn't. Maybe she couldn't accurately describe because she was torn between it hurting and feeling good. He leaned in to press more lingering kisses into her neck, up along her cheek. To sooth and distract her she suspected. "Why did you... does it feel good?"

"Yes." His answer was so simple... perhaps a little strain in his tone. He was being so patient and here she was digging her nails into his belly to keep him from moving. She very carefully drew her hand away.

"Okay."

"Okay?" He waited just a moment longer before he started slowly rocking into her It was clear he was in no rush to finish this. He wanted to take his time with her. He kissed her gently here and there, reached up to stroke fingers along her cheek. Everything that he did with her was gentle. For a time at least.

She could only watch his face as he moved, though once or twice curiosity got the best of her and she glanced between them. It was not at all what she had expected, but this closeness she enjoyed. It was good. So worth waiting. She knew that if it were with anyone else... someone she had no feelings for it couldn't be nearly this good.

"Ben..." She whispered, voice breathy and breath heated as she stroked her fingers through his hair. "I love you."

He licked his lips, leaned his face closer to hers and rested his forehead against hers, turning slightly so his nose brushed hers lightly.

"I love you... so much..." Though he paused and shifted. He knew that he was... off so to speak... that it wasn't as good for her as it could be and so he moved again, changed the angle a bit... tried to learn what was best for her. "Tell me if this is better..."

Neither of them were experienced, had no idea what they were doing, but he was trying.

Her hand slid down from his hair to his shoulder and her nails dug into the muscle there as a little gasp escaped her. She wasn't sure what it was he had done, but things changed... felt a lot better. If she thought it was good before that was nothing compared to now.

"Yes."

"Yes?" He asked with a faint smile, leaning further over her as he increased the pace. He turned his face towards hers. He pressed as many sloppy kisses into her cheek as he could manage. As many as she would allow.

She quickly shifted under him, brought her knee up, knocked him hard in the ribs with how suddenly she moved, but it didn't seem to sway him or change anything. Rather he reached down to press his hand against the outside of her thigh and keep her there. He loved having her curled around him, but he noticed the way that she shook against him and lifted his head to meet her eyes.

"You're trembling... does it feel that good or are you afraid?"

"A little of both." Of course she was scared of all of this. Ben was huge... massive above her and it both terrified and comforted her that he completely engulfed her, but she knew that he was afraid too. All she could really do was hold him as close as he held her.

Regardless of the fear of the unknown she loved him and that outweighed everything. She loved this man. It had never been more clear to her than now. Now when he was so close that his breath mingled with hers... when he exhaled and she breathed in the very breath that he had breathed... that had been deep within his lungs. When he breathed in hers. When his chest was against hers and his heart was right there... right there beating wildly beside her own.

There was something building between them now and she wasn't sure what it was. It washed over her, made her muscles tense and tighten and then completely loosen and relax and even draw out a sound from her she never expected to have made. Whatever it was she knew he felt it too because he pressed as close to her as possible with a low, breathy gasp.

She didn't move for some time nor did he... neither really made an effort to. Though she knew it hadn't last quite so long she still felt... almost exhausted and somehow rested. It was a very strange feeling.

After some time she brushed a hand over his ribs and shifted under him. He twisted away from the touch then and she tried to look at his face, but it was hidden away in her shoulder... that place he seemed to like to lazily press kisses into...

"Are you ticklish?"

" _NO_." He answered, long and drawn out and then she did it again and he had the same reaction. " _Yes_."

Though at first neither said anything they both broke out into a sort of easy laughter and he pressed a few more lazy kisses to her cheek and down her chin, up to the corner of her mouth where she turned to meet his kiss.

"Does this mean I can sleep with you again?"

"Mmm... yes." Again he cracked a smile and both shared a small bout of laughter.

She lifted her hand to his face again, brushed the tips of her fingers over his chin and watched the way he smiled. She had never seen Ben so happy before, but in all honesty she had never been so happy before either.

Though she watched his smile change as his hand brushed right over her ribs and she flinched in on herself and heard that little sound, something like laughter.

"Quit it!" She shoved his hands away -completely unable to hide the laughter in her own voice- held them tightly in hers to keep him from doing it again.

"You're ticklish too..." He teased and she suspected she couldn't wipe that smile off with a mop. "I'm so in love with you..."

"I know... and you know..." Rey only shook her head. It was obvious. He hardly needed to say so at this point... nor did she. He knew she loved him. She lifted his hand to her mouth and pressed her own kiss against his knuckles. She felt him shift around slightly, just enough to get them onto their sides, but not far away from one another. She never thought him to be the type to cuddle, but here he was, curling up as close to her as he could get.

For once... Rey realized as she drifted off with him... that she truly didn't care if Luke never came back for them. Forget Luke. Forget the academy... forget parents who abandoned their children... forget the world... all they needed was each other.

This was true happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I struggled to get this chapter up not only because I wanted to get it up as quickly as I could because I wanted it up before TLJ, but also because of the sex scene. Most reylo sex scenes tend to be purely smut... not a lot of feeling and so I wanted to contribute something that was more... intimate and purposely awkward for a first time. I've never done this before so I hope that it comes across the way I intended.
> 
> As for the future of this fic... depending on how TLJ goes I may or may not continue this. It was why I decided to leave this chapter on a pleasant note and have it much longer than my others. Good luck my fellow reylos and may the force be with our ship.


	11. Day 4,902

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 4,902

The early morning light was what woke her from her sleep and Rey let out a soft little sigh as she shifted slightly only to find the weight of an arm draped over her. That in and of itself was surprising to her. Ben tended to wake before she did and so she was quite thrown to turn and find that he was right there still. Normally he would be up and working.

He looked so different when he slept. Peaceful. As if perhaps all his fears and worries vanished in his sleep.

Reaching out she brushed her fingers over the point of his cheekbone and towards the edge before drawing back the other way and tracing over the bridge of his nose slowly. He made a little sound and shifted slightly, but he didn't wake so she continued her exploration of his face. Her fingers dropped from the edge of his nose, across his lips briefly and down to brush over his chin that always seemed a little crooked.

"What... are you doing?" His question came out low and gravelly.

"Admiring." She answered him, reaching up to brush the hair back from his brow. She felt his little sigh... that little puff of breath against the inside of her wrist. She watched the way the corner of his mouth curled upwards into a sincere, crooked little smile.

"I'm glad that we're here together... I know that... it's hard here... surviving here, but I... I couldn't think of anywhere I would rather be." At first he had resented the situation that he had been placed in. Had hated that his uncle used this as an excuse to get rid of him, but she was the one person in this world that cared for him. He was lucky to be here with her.

"I hated it at first too. Now... I'm glad that we're here together too. To think... if things had been even slightly different... you and I might have been separated completely... fighting on our own." She mused softly.

"What if we run away?" He asked quietly as possible... as if even just speaking the words would bring the entire world crashing down on them.

"Where would we even go? What if... what if Luke comes back for us and we're not here?" It was impossible. They could never leave. Luke may well come back for them and if he did they had to be here.

"You're right..." He shifted closer to her. Close enough he could rest his head against her chest comfortably and listen to the sound of her heart.

Besides... they didn't even have a ship. They were trapped here and they were never going to leave. Not until someone came back, but... maybe that wasn't such a bad thing. They had each other.


	12. Day 5,001

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 5,001

Things had changed between the two of them drastically. She noticed the difference almost immediately. It wasn't a bad change, but she was still getting used to the fact that sleeping in the same bed together and physical intimacy were the normal thing now. Not the cold nights on alone in her own bed. She like that she could just turn over and curl into him when she got too cold. He tended to run hot like her own personal heater.

And Ben himself had changed. He didn't seem as angry or as tense as he had been before all of this. Loving someone. Having someone to love him back... she wondered if that was what he had really needed most of all. She only wished she'd had the courage to say something sooner, but Luke was right. Good things came out of bad sometimes. Without that bad situation this never would have happened. They'd have both become Jedi. No chance of a relationship. No attachments.

He woke early that morning as usual, but she had been awake early as well thinking. With a little sigh and a shuffle of blankets he turned towards her to drape an arm over her. She knew he was awake, but sometimes he liked to pretend he was asleep and just drape himself over her like a big, friendly lothcat.

"Ben?"

"Mmm?"

"I'm glad we ended up stranded here together." She told him and then heard him snort as if it was the most ridiculous thing he'd ever heard.

"Why?"

"If we'd become Jedi... you and I... this never would have been possible."

"I-..." He went silent then as he thought about it because it was true. "So am I."

He buried his face further into her neck and sighed. There was a time that he desperately wanted to be a Jedi, but he knew Luke saw darkness in him and the only thing his family could ever see when they looked at him was Vader. So he had been sent away here where he couldn't harm anyone.

"Are you going to stay for breakfast?"

"No... I have to head out early to trade in some things for a few parts to keep everything up and running around here."

"Can I come along."

"Not this time. I need you here to watch over things. I don't want us to get raided again." He knew that she could handle fighting off raiders. She was one of the best fighters that he'd ever seen. She had a certain natural ability and he trusted her to be able to take care of things while he was gone.

With a low groan he forced himself up and out of bed. He felt her arms around his waist as he sat up and her kisses against his shoulder and smiled slightly. If she was trying to get him to stay she was doing a good job, but no. He absolutely had to go.

"If you come back quick... I'll give you a really long shoulder massage."

"Oh... please do..." That had him getting up and getting dressed, because he very much wanted to hurry back for that.

While he was goal oriented and she couldn't stop him from leaving she knew that she could at least get him to return home soon and nothing could do that like working the sore muscles of his back. It made him feel better and she was able to admire. A win for them both in her opinion.

She watched him walk out the door and then sighed. She was going to have to keep herself entertained while he was gone. She'd never much liked being left alone, but he was right of course. Someone had to stay behind and make sure nobody stole from them again, because they really couldn't afford another incident.

For the time being she read a few books that had been downloaded onto the datapad. Old books that Ben liked to read. Long, fancy classics with big words. Poetry. She read an entire book and then checked the time.

But Ben still wasn't back. That was odd. She was sure that he would have rushed back as quickly as he could to make sure she kept her promise, but he wasn't. Sighing she opened up another book and read a chapter or two.

And still he wasn't back.

Now Rey was becoming worried. It was starting to get dark. Ben would never stay out long enough to get caught at night in the desert. He knew the dangers and so did she. She sighed and stood up to make her way over to the windows. She didn't see him on his way back. He wasn't on the horizon at all.

She waited for half an hour long and when he still did not arrive she made up her mind to go look for him. Forget guarding their supplies. They replaced them once and they could do it again. His life was more important.

Grabbing her gear Rey rushed out the door and uncovered the speeder she'd built, climbed up onto it and prayed the engine was going to start. It was luck that it sputtered, but then rumbled to life and she was suddenly flying across the sand in a hurry to check along the path that lead to the outpost.

Her biggest fear was that if she didn't hurry while she had some light that she wouldn't be able to find him in the darkness.

As she continued along the path she didn't see him on his way back still. There was nothing out here. Absolutely nothing and then suddenly there was something off to the side of the path against the wreckage of someone's old X-34 landspeeder.

Bodies she realized. There had been a fight that'd ended in bloodshed. It had her slamming the brakes on her speeder and then leaping off to check over them.

They were Dead-enders Rey realized. She wasn't sure what they were doing here, because they tended to stay in the canyons of Carbon Ridge. She turned over several of the bodies and found that fortunately none of them were Ben. She made her way around the side of the broken down speeder only to have her worst fear confirmed.

He was there. Leaned with his back up against the side of the busted down landspeeder. His hand was off to the side completely limp and she feared the worst. She very slowly approached him and noted he was breathing. Thankfully.

"Ben?" At her words he slowly lifted his head and his face was nothing but a picture of misery and pain. Her gaze lowered from his face down to where the most blood was and she kneeled in front of him to pull back the clothing from it. The cloth peeled back and he made a pained sound. The moment she saw the wound she had to suppress the horrified sound she wanted to make for his sake.

They'd tried to eviscerate him. If they had gone just a bit deeper she was sure that they would have and he would surely have been dead by the time she found him. He must have been in the heat for so long... burning up... losing blood with no water.

She reached around for the canteen and pulled it up to place against his mouth so that he could drink and it took a moment for him to register that she was holding up the water for him, but he started to drink deeply the moment he realized it was there. He'd been dying of thirst for hours it seemed and no words could describe how good the water tasted.

As much as she hated to do it she had to take it away from him. Too much too fast wasn't good for him.

"Can you move at all?" She asked softly, about to reach up and touch his face, but she stopped short because she wasn't sure how badly he was hurt.

She watched the way he licked his lips as he tried to work up the words. It seemed even speaking was a struggle for him.

"I can't..."

"If I help you?"

"I can't." He said again. A little more forcefully. "I tried... I can't..."

"Okay... just... stay here... I'm going to... figure something out." Rey looked around the area and knew that if he couldn't move she was going to have to find a way to transport him back safely. With an injury like that he wouldn't be able to ride along with her.

There was a large piece of durasteel wedged in the sand and she thought for sure she could rig up a sort of stretcher for him. She grabbed some of the ropes from her speeder and tied up the piece of durasteel securely to it. She gave it a good tug to make sure it was going to stay on and once she was satisfied it wasn't going anywhere the hard part came.

She searched for the best way to move him and settled for sliding her arms underneath his and trying to shift him around, but as she moved him he cried out and weakly shoved at her to get her away.

"Stop! Stop... I can't... I can't... please..." He pleaded, but it was no use. He was in far too much pain. There was no relief in sight.

"I'm sorry, Ben, but I have to." She hated causing him pain, but this was for the best. She had to get him out of here and back home where she could get a better look at his injury. Get him back home where he wouldn't freeze in the cold night air.

She started to drag him towards the durasteel and had to ignore the cries of agony from him no matter how much it pained her to hear. She manged to get him onto her makeshift stretcher after much effort and she struggled to secure him. It wasn't easy. She had to try not to hurt him anymore than she already had in moving him.

Once she was sure he wasn't going anywhere she climbed into the seat and started the speeder up and started going slowly. She checked back to make sure he was doing alright and then sped up a bit. It hurt him. Of course it hurt him. Every little bump they hit along the road was excruciating for him and she had no choice. She had to put him through it. She had to keep reminding herself that he was going to die if she left him out here.

The trip back must have been hell for him, but once they arrived she was quick to drag him into the elevator shaft despite his protests.

"Aren't you glad we repaired the lift?" She asked, trying to maybe say something to humor him, but it was clear by the way that he turned his head to the side with a grimace there was no humor to be had. Once it came to a stop she let out a breath. "Just a little further okay?"

She dragged him the last of the way to the bed where he could at least be a little more comfortable. She was exhausted having moved his massive form as far as she did, but she knew that she couldn't stop. He needed immediate medical care and she couldn't stop to rest now. At least now that he'd stopped moving he wasn't in quite as much pain.

Snatching up the medical kit she peeled off his upper robes and when she really got a good look at his wound it shocked her. It wasn't like a holofilm. It wasn't some thin little wound after a slash from a knife. No. This wound split his skin apart enough that she could faintly see the whitish, yellow tissues under his skin and blood.

Taking a breath to steady herself Rey grabbed a bottle and washed out the wound with water to try and flush out any sand that might have gotten into it. From there she opened up the medical box and retrieved some bacta and gathered up as much on her fingers as she could and carefully pressed it into the wound. He jerked and tried to shove her hands away. As could be expected, but she had to get as much of the healing gel into his wound as possible.

Next she grabbed a needle and thread and inched closer to him to star to stitch him up. It was crude compared to the technology they had now, but they didn't have access to that technology here on this planet and she needed to use what she had. She knew it was beyond painful to him. The stitching. The way he twitched and struggled to squirm away, but didn't have the strength to. He'd lost too much blood.

Once she was sure he was securely closed up she bandaged him up to keep anymore sand out of his wound. He gave no reaction. Clearly worn out by everything tat he had gone through in the span of a fear hours. He just didn't have the strength anymore.

"I'm done. Okay? You're going to be fine now." She glanced down at her hands covered in his blood and quickly washed it away and then dried her hands. "Are you thirsty?"

He slowly shook his head in response. She wasn't sure what to do from here. She had done really all that she could. All they had to do now was to wait for him to heal up and everything would be back to normal. He'd killed those Dead-enders that'd attacked him. They wouldn't be a problem anymore.

Now that he was was tended to he tried to sleep that night, but the pain that he was in was just too much. Sleep was impossible at that point. It kept him groaning and shifting, desperate to find a position that may be less painful, but one didn't exist for him.

Rey stayed up with him for hours throughout the night, but he seemed to be getting worse instead of better. She couldn't tell if his pain was getting more intense or he had just bared it for so long he couldn't stand much more. Whatever the case... it was clear that he wasn't getting better and Rey was beginning to fear for his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *whispers* I'm so sorry.


	13. Day 5,003

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 5,003

Sometime during the middle of the night last night after going for so many hours with sleep his body had enough and Ben had fallen asleep. Except... he hadn't woken up or so much as moved a single inch and with that burning fever Rey feared he died during the night. If he had... what would she do?

She was too afraid to check. She sat there with her knees up to her chest far too afraid to check. What if he really was dead? What if... what if the only person she had in this world was gone? How could she live without him? She didn't think she would be able to stand life without him by her side.

The only think she could do was watch his chest with baited breath, but it was hard to tell if he was breathing or not from where she was and she wasn't really sure if she wanted to find out. She thought her worst fears would surely come to light if she looked.

And... if he wasn't? She didn't want to disturb his rest. It had been so hard for him to fall asleep when he was in so much pain. So she was torn. She didn't know what to do other than to just wait. Maybe his body was just catching up on the rest he had missed.

There was a sudden sharp intake of air and she was both greatly relieved and disappointed that he was unable to get more rest.

With the amount of pain that he had been in the deep slumber that he'd managed to fall into was a temporary reprieve, but it didnt' last... he could have sworn whenever he did start to doze off someone was making the most awful sounds that were keeping him awake.

Rey reluctantly informed him that he was the one making the sounds. It was strange really how he wasn't even aware of it. In fact a lot of things were suddenly very hazy to him.

"You should drink some water..." She urged, but he turned his head away. He couldn't accept the water. "Ben... please..."

"No... don't... waste any more resources on me... you shouldn't... have even used your medical supplies on me." He was thirsty from blood loss. Of course he was, but he couldnt be a drain on her resources.

"It isn't a waste..." It upset her that he was even thinking that he was a waste of resources... that he would even feel the need to go that far and say it.

But... he knew that Rey was wasting her resources. He was getting worse and worse as time went on. His fever felt so hot it might melt his skin from his bones... and there was nobody to help them. Nobody was going to come back for them. They had left them to die here. To let the sands of Jakku do their dirty work for them.

It tore at his heart and he shifted uncomfortably there on the blankets -already uncomfortably soaked through with sweat- because he knew... he knew that he was going to die and Rey was going to be all alone. He wasn't going to be able to protect or take care of her anymore. He let out a mournful sound and swallowed with difficulty.

His worst fear was finally coming true.

"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry, Rey..." Despite how much he wanted to be strong, he was so sick and in so much pain he could not stop the tears that welled up in his eyes. "I really don't want to leave you..."

Of all the difficult things that Rey had faced in her life... seeing the strongest person she knew fall apart from fever and pain had to be the hardest, but she knew that if Ben was too sick... in too much pain... that she had to fight back her own tears and be strong for him.

"Ben... it's... you're gong to be fine. Everything is going to be fine." She shifted over towards him and carefully lifted his head into her lap, because she knew that she could really do nothing else to comfort him. All she could do was hold him. "Just sleep... in the morning everything will be fine. You'll feel better. I promise."

She stroked her fingers through his hair slowly, trying her best to soothe him, but still it was hours before he was able to slip into sleep. Hours of suffering and then finally the sweet reprieve of sleep.

Rey paused once she realized he was asleep and then her fingers slowly slid down the side of his face to his pulse point. His heart was pounding and she feared that he was struggling to breathe with how fast his breath came, but what was most concerning to her was the bluish coloring to his lips and the heat radiating off of him from his fever.

She was not a doctor and she had no real medical knowledge, but that in and of itself was scary, because she didn't know what was wrong with him. She had never before wished more than she did now that she had some medical training. Anything. She didn't know if she needed to change his blankets and keep him warm or to toss them aside and help him cool down.

A groan drew her attention. Her thoughts were cut short. Ben was mumbling something and for just a moment she thought that he was awake. That he might be asking her for something, but a quick glance at his face determined that wasn't the case. No. He was simply mumbling something.

Though what that might be was too difficult for her to make out. She strained to hear whatever it was, held her breath as if that might aid her endeavor. and then she caught the word that slipped past his lips.

_'Mama'_

Rey bit her lip and glanced away. In the most broken and heartbreaking tone Ben was crying out in a fever dream for his mother. He sounded so desperate for his mother. He said it over and over again and despite the fact that his eyes were closed when Rey looked back at him again she noticed the tear that slipped from under a closed eye and mixed with the sweat to slowly roll down his face.

His mother. That was it! That was her chance to save Ben.

As carefully as she could manage Rey shifted his head back into a pillow and then dusted some sand off herself before she made her way over to the bag in the corner and dug around until she found the datapad.

She turned the datapad in her hand and took a deep breath, opened up the back panel and then tore out the inhibitor. There was no other choice. She had to. She had to do this. She wasn't going to let Ben die. It didn't matter if this was dangerous. it didn't matter if she was breaking the rules. Life wasn't worth living without him.

Still for just a second she hesitated, finger hovering over the number, but she pressed down on it and then watched as the call started going through. She thanked the force that it was actually going through. That there were no more problems.

"Hello? Who is this?" An older woman answered and for just a moment Rey stared in awe at the woman before her. Was this what his mother looked like? She looked confident, firm, but despite both those things sweet.

"Are you... Ben's mother?" Although she asked it she was sure that it must be.

"Yes." And then there was a pause and Leia's voice took on a different tone. One filled with a mother's love and concern for her son. Something that Rey had never known. "Is there something wrong? Has something happened to Ben?"

"He was hurt... and now he's sick."

"Let me speak to Luke." Leia requested and Rey frowned slightly in response. Luke? Why did Leia think Master Luke was here?

"He isn't here..."

"He's not at the academy? I could have sworn he was."

"The-... no. We're not at the Academy... we're on Jakku." Rey explained carefully.

"Jakku? The junkyard?" Leia's tone was skeptical for a moment, because she could hardly believe her brother would have sent her son out into a junkyard. Let alone allow him to be injured so terribly without calling her immediately.

"It's where Master Luke put us for the past..." And then Rey paused and glanced at the marks in the wall. "Five thousand days..." and three, but she didn't dare add that.

It was then that Leia was silent for a short time and she seemed to be adding it up. Counting the years. Figuring when she had last heard from her son and from Luke. There was something about her expression that darkened perhaps. Whatever it was she didn't look happy.

"Listen to me very carefully. If you're on Jakku then you need to go to Tuanul. It's a village near Kelvin Ravine. A good friend of Luke and I is the Elder there. Ask for Lor San Tekka. He can help. Tell him that I sent you. He'll listen."

"Okay."

"Call me back right away and tell me how my son is."

"I promise."

The call ended then and Rey took a breath. Of course. Of course Ben's mother would help and she was so grateful. Now she had someone on her side if Luke became angry with her for having broken the rules, but even if Luke was angry it was worth it. She would take whatever scorn he had for her if it meant saving Ben's life.

Tucking the datapad back into the bag she turned back to Ben and tried to figure out the easiest way she was going to move him before comping to the conclusion that there wasn't an easy way to move him. She'd have to do this the hard way.

She moved behind him and lifted him under the arms and then started to slowly drag him backwards towards the lift. He didn't wake up. He didn't stir even slightly. Though it worried her she was also grateful because that meant that he didn't have to endure this entire trip in agony. He had suffered long enough.

The makeshift sled was still attached to the speeder. She'd had no time to remove it. It was easy to get him up onto it compared to moving him from the bridge. Once he was secured she mounted up and fired up the engine to start their trip across the desert.

Looking out over the horizon Rey knew that she would have to hurry, because now only was it getting dark she could also see a storm brewing in the distance. It would be bad to be caught out in a storm at night. It may be the end of them both.

Though the trip wasn't nearly as long as it seemed she was anxious to get there quickly and that made it seem as if she had been moving for hours. Eventually though she caught sight of the lights of the village and as she pulled up next one of the buildings a few villagers looked on and finally one of them approached her.

Pulling down the mask that covered her face to make her seem less of a threat to these people she jumped down from the speeder.

"I'm looking for your village elder... Lor San Tekka?" As Rey spoke she noticed how cautious these people seemed. She wondered why. "Leia sent me... my-... Ben is hurt..."

She wasn't sure what she had been about to say, but now that she thought of it she didn't know what Ben was to her. What exactly was he to her? Her friend? No. Fellow student? Also no. A boyfriend? No. Not that. Something more.

"Leia? Did you say, Leia?" An older man stepped out from one of the huts and approached them slowly, looking at the man that this girl had brought who appeared to be dead. At least if one looked from a distance. "You made contact with the outside?"

"I didn't have a choice. He was going to die." Rey's gaze hardened. So this man knew who they were and why they were here. He must be Luke and Leia's friend Lor San Tekka. The village elder. "Please."

"Take him inside. Treat him as best you can." He ordered and a few men rushed over to get Ben inside one of the huts. "You said you made contact with the outside. Do you know how reckless your actions have been?"

"I only contact his mother. Leia had a right to know that her son was dying."

"And now you're both at risk. Anyone could have intercepted the message. Anyone." Tekka was not pleased to know what she had done.

"I'm saving Ben's life!"

"You're endangering everyone's lives! Everyone here. This village. You. Him. Me."

"So you're going to just let him die?!" Rey questioned and Lor San Tekka stopped and turned towards her.

"We will do what we can for him." He assured her and stepped into the hut that they had brought Ben into. He was already being looked over. "What can you tell me?"

The man looking over him sat up and sighed. "There's nothing we can do."

"Nothing? You looked at him for less than two minutes!" Rey was outraged that this man was writing Ben off so quickly and so easily, but the man took Ben's arm and lifted his hand, showed the tips of his fingers.

"Do you see this blue discoloring? The fever? His wound is infected. He's gone septic. We can't do anything for him. Even if we did have the proper medical equipment in this village... he would still be beyond the point that we could do anything." The man did sound genuinely sorry, but it wasn't good enough for her.

"Please... there has to be something... this is a sacred village... can't we use the force? Can't we just... heal him?" She hoped that there was some sort of technique that could heal him... that could save him.

"You've become attached to young Solo." Lor San Tekka chided her as if she was still a young padawan and knew nothing. "Death is the natural order of things. Trying to force your will on nature is perverse."

Rey could hardly believe the words coming out of Tekka's mouth. He was going to just let Ben die even though he was friends with Leia, but there was more in his words than just the fact that he was willing to let Ben die. He had said not to force her will on nature. That meant that there was a force technique that she could use. That meant she could save Ben. Even if they wouldn't.

"Then there's nothing left for us to say to one another." She kept her tone firm and even, but she hated the fact that this man was so cold.

Once the two men stepped outside of the hut Rey was kneeling beside Ben and checking him. He was still alive, but he wouldn't be for much longer if she didn't act quickly. She peeked out from the doorway and noticed Tekka speaking with a small group of people... he was busy. Good.

Confirming that she turned towards the shelves. There were medical supplies... lots of them... but the man hadn't been lying. She knew that nothing here could help Ben... except... there were some books... covered in dust and hidden away behind some jars.

Blowing some dust off the covers Rey realized she recognized this foreign writing. She recognized it, because Ben had taught her. These were Jedi texts. So Rey realized that these people... they did have a way to help him, but because they thought it was wrong to interfere... they would let him die.

Giving another glance to make sure they were still occupied Rey grabbed the books and shoved them into the bag slung over her shoulder before she turned back to Ben. She was going to get him out of here. She was going to heal him herself.

The moment that she saw Tekka and the others head over to another building she quickly turned to Ben again and reached under his arms to start to hurriedly drag him back to the speeder. There was little time. She secured him and it was just as she mounted up she heard a voice call out.

"Hey! Where are you going?" One of the villagers questioned, but she ignored it and kicked the speeder into gear before rushing out of the village. There was more shouting behind her, but she didn't stop.

They were going to know that she had stolen the texts, but they had left her with no other choice. It was dark now. Night had fallen and looking to her right she saw the storm was that much closer. The land lit up with streaks of lightning. All the more reason to speed up and get them home.

Luck was on their side for once, because the storm hit them just as she was pulling into the hanger. In here they were safe from the violent storm and from here Rey reached into her bag for a light and the books.

Spreading them out in front of the light she opened up the first one and a loud crackle of lightning startled her and the sand scraped against the hull of the ship... various things blown by the harsh winds slammed into the metal, but she had to focus on the task at hand and began to search through the books for the section on healing.

The first one proved to be a bust. There was nothing. She moved onto the second book and she became worried as it also held nothing... and then the third and final book... there! There it was... healing, but she had to struggle to remember the words... the symbols that Ben had taught her.

As she reached over to hold her hands out over his wound and closed her eyes... concentrate... reach out in the force. As she did so the storm seemed to grow even more intense. The angry crackling of lightning seemed louder. More dangerous. The most brutal storm that she had ever heard in all her life.

There was no going back.

The force under her hands felt as electric as the storm outside. As dangerous, but she noticed that there was definitely something. She felt something. A change and when Rey glanced down she noticed the wound was healing. What she was doing was working. She just had to use a little more force... even if it was taking it's toll on her. It was like she'd run for miles in the hot desert and needed to sleep.

But her work paid off. There was still the discoloring. A scar formed, but the wound... the bleeding... the infection... she had managed to use the force to repair the damage... and she was exhausted.

With his life out of danger... Rey had a lot to think about.

"You were right, Ben. Luke isn't coming back for us. He left us to die here." She made up her mind once and for all. It was time to leave Jakku behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more to go. I apologize it's taken so long. Unfortunately I've been in the hospital. I also apologize that this may be the worst written chapter yet.


	14. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue

There was a sound. Something soft. Something quiet. A sort of pattering. Strange, because if he didn't know any better... he would have said for certain it was rain. Taking in a deep breath he was so sure that he smelled rain, but none of that could be right. It was impossible... it didn't rain on Jakku.

He opened his eyes and found himself in a dark room that he did not recognize. He started to sit up slowly, but inhaled sharply and grabbed at his side as he realized he was a bit sore. He tried to recall what had even happened. How did he get here and where exactly was he right now?

That he did not know. He only noted that the wound he recalled getting was now just a wide scar. Just a reminder, but there were other things outside of himself that he noticed.

It was raining outside the open balcony doors and the thin, white curtains danced gently in the breeze like phantoms. It was most certainly not Jakku weather. This was pleasant and peaceful. If he wasn't so confused and concerned about where he was... about where Rey was... he might have stopped to enjoy it.

Maneuvering himself out of the bed his feet touched cold marble and he glanced down at the elaborate flooring in surprise. It just gave him even more questions that needed answering... so he hurried across the room towards the door and pulled it open. The hallway was just as elaborate, but at least there was a light at the end.

He made his way towards the light slowly, with only the sound of the rain and his breathing to accompany him. The uncertainty of what he might find when he rounded the hall towards that light was terrifying in a way. Knowing nothing was terrifying.

What he saw once he stepped into a dining room was... not at all what he had expected... his mother sat there at the table... with Lando... and his half brother Finn... and most importantly Rey. Everyone looked at him once he'd come into the room, but the first one up was Rey. She crashed into his chest and he barely maintained his balance.

"Rey?" He questioned, wincing as his voice came out gravelly from disuse. "Where...?"

"Naboo..." Rey answered, tightening her arms around him. "You were dying, Ben... I called your mother. She brought us here."

"Why didn't you call me when Luke left you on Jakku, Ben? I would have come for you right away." His mother spoke up and he sighed softly.

"I didn't think you would have cared... you never called me..." There was maybe a hint of anger in his voice, but he did well enough controlling it. The years he'd spend on Jakku had done wonders for his patients if nothing else.

"Come on now, Ben." Lando cut in. "You know that the interference at the academy was nearly impossible to get through. We tried plenty of times to contact you. We just never got through."

"You started a new family easy enough..." It was a good thing that Rey was holding him, trying to sooth him, because that was something that might have pushed him over the edge, but Rey was a smart girl. She knew to keep holding him.

"I thought that you would be happy that I found someone else, Ben. Is it because of your father?" Leia knew he was upset and she knew that he had a right to be. That he must have felt betrayed.

"I am happy you found someone else. And I don't miss Han Solo at all... he left us... how could I miss him?" Though despite those words Rey knew very well that Ben did miss his father and that he wished he hadn't abandoned them. Regardless he knew Lando was the better man and he was glad that his mother was being taken care of the way that she deserved, but... Finn... he wondered if they had replaced him with their new son. "What about him?"

"We were going to send your brother to the academy as well, but he had other interests and so we didn't." Leia tried to be gentle with him. She knew what would happen if he lost his temper.

"I had other interests, but you sent me away."

"Ben... your powers were-"

"Out of control? Because I was a monster?"

"No! I never thought you were a monster.  _Ever_ , Ben. You're my son. I love you. I was only doing what I thought was best for you. I just wish that I had learned sooner that I was wrong and made the biggest mistake of my life." Leia knew that it had taken her far too long to make that choice, but now she was trying to fix it. "Words will never be enough to express how sorry I am, but please, Ben... please... give us a chance to begin again."

"I would love the chance to be a father to you." Lando spoke up.

"And..." It was Finn's turn to speak. "I'd really like to get to know my brother."

"I-..." But his words died in his throat as he looked at them. A part of him badly wanted to accept the family he'd always wanted, yet he feared that he would never belong. Never fit in with them. "I'll think about it."

Nobody questioned it because they all knew how hard this was. They understood. He reached his hands down to carefully pry Rey off of him and then turned to go back down the hallway, back down to the bedroom. He assumed this room was his. He'd woken in it after all so he didn't know why it wouldn't be.

It was the soft breeze that drew his attention before anything and he slowly made his way over to the balcony, though he only stood in the doorway and didn't step out because he didn't want to get soaked. It was calming and just what he needed right now. He took a moment to just breathe it all in.

At least until he heard the door closing and glanced over his shoulder to see Rey there. She looked nervous.

"Are you mad at me, Ben? For calling your mother?" She feared it made be the case with the rift that he had with his family.

"No. Not at you." He answered quietly. "Just them."

"You were dying... and I didn't know what else to do."

"I know, Rey. It's alright." She was the only person in the world that he knew that he would never be able to stay angry with even if she had done something to upset him, but he wasn't upset. Not with her.

"How are you feeling?" Was her next question as she stepped forward to trace a hand over his lower stomach where the faint scar remained.

"Good. All things considered, but... I don't... remember anything after those dead-enders and their red haired leader tore me up..." But they weren't trapped on Jakku with those ex-imperials anymore anyways. It didn't matter he supposed. What did matter however was her touch on him. "I do remember you promising me something if I got back soon enough... guess I didn't make the deadline, huh?"

"Ben!" Though she tried to sound as if she was chiding him there was still a hint of a smile in her voice. "You're absolutely incorrigible."

"Mmm. I love the way you say words..." He started to nudge her backwards towards the bed and she begrudgingly went along with it at first, but once her knees hit the back of it she sat down and pulled him with her. "...that Coruscanti accent... do you know what that does to me?"

"I think I can feel it well enough." Her nose scrunched up adorably as she said it and he burst into laughter and dropped his head down onto her shoulder. Only Rey could make him forget about how upset he had been moments ago.

"Is that right?" He made himself more comfortable against her and closed his eyes when her hand came up to gently stroke through his hair. It brought something back. Hints of broken memories of being ill. Not much at all, but comfort that she gave him.

"Do you know what you're going to do, yet?" Rey asked softly and he knew that she wasn't asking about their current situation, but the one with his family.

"No." His lips lightly grazed her pulse point as he spoke.

"I really think you should give them a chance, Ben. Your family came back for you." It was something that Rey had always wished that hers would do, but no. They'd sold her and forgotten all about her... his though... Leia took her in as well. Treated her like a daughter, but she suspected because Leia could guess that there was something between them. "They gave us a home. Took us from that horrible place. Leia told me this lake house is all yours."

"I'll give them a chance..." He whispered against her skin. "But, Rey... you're my home... above everything else. You're all I want. All I need."

He felt the way her arms tightened around him. He was aware that he must have scared her when he had been hurt that badly. That she must have thought that she was going to lose him and he felt sorry that she had to suffer that.

"I was afraid that you-"

"I know. I'm sorry." He let out a sigh against her skin and then he reached over to search around for the blanket, found it eventually half on the floor where he must have shoved it while he slept, and pulled it over them to keep away the chill from the breeze. "But we're together now. We're safe. We never have to be afraid again."

And it was true. Here away from that junkyard. Here on a planet full of life. Safe in his grandmother's hideaway. They could finally relax. Finally breathe. Finally let go. They would never have to be afraid ever again and they would never have to be apart.

Their life together was only beginning and they both had the feeling that from here on out it was going to be full of only good things.  
  
No more counting days.  
  
~FIN~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that you all enjoyed this tale. I will be starting another short series soon and I hope you will all join me for that adventure as well.
> 
> As always thank you for joining me on this journey and God Bless.


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